Lonely, sad & desperate.
My husband is a truck driver. He used to come home and we would have a little honeymoon then he would be back on the road.
His sleeping patterns have changed over the past 2 years and so has his need for intimacy. We went from a healthy sex life - extremely frequent (prior to truck driving) to non-existent. He has some impotent issues - that he won't see a doctor for, which has definitely effected his desire.
Our marriage has mostly been a joke. Even though I believe he loves me, his childhood and war experiences have distanced him from me and our children.
Our children are grown now, but life with him has always been emotionally difficult. Now before you ask why I stay, I stay because most of my family has passed and he is my family. I take my vows seriously and I do not believe in divorce.
Our children live with us, which is a problem. My daughter is just 20 and in school - so that doesn't seem to bother him much. (she's being proactive with bettering her life). My son on the other hand is ex-Army. He wanted to make it a career but got kicked out because of runner's knee & scoliosis. He does chores on our farm but has no ambition. I KNOW that their lack of prosperity is weighing heavily on my husband and is most likely causing many problems within our marriage.
I just want to make it know that I am lonely & sad and I want more intimacy. It doesn't even have to be sex. I just want to cuddle, but he won't even sleep in our bed. (he sleeps on the couch). Sometimes I think he does this to punish me because he knows it really bothers me.
My feelings are pretty raw and fragile, but if anyone could just give me some encouraging suggestions I would be eternally grateful. Thank you.