Obsessed husband has ZERO time for family
I really feel like I'm at a crossroad here and I need some advice.
Here are my issues with my husband:
-He spends literally all of his time off of work playing "rome:total war" which is a computer game.
- He is a habitual liar even about things that wouldn't even upset me in any way.
- he is OBSESSED with porn and yet has no desire/energy, etc. for the real thing
When i say every minute on the computer I mean it....he rarely even gets off to go cook something.
He doesn't even play through the game to beat it, he just restarts about 3-4 times a day. And this isn't one of those story-line type games it's just repetitive.
If anything (me or one of our 3 kids) takes him away from his game or tries to get his attention he gets INSANELY mad. and starts saying that we just want to "be the center of his attention and can't stand it when we're not"...but the truth is we never even have an ounce of his attention let alone ALL of it! And i am being perfectly honest there!
The second is...He is a BIG TIME liar....nothing is ever his fault because he always has an "excuse" for how someone else MADE him do it. And he doesn't just lie about things that would make me mad or hurt me...it's almost like he'll lie just to lie....for example....I couldn't find our boys' birth certs one time and asked him where he put them. He said he never touched them. I said I just put them on the shelf yesterday and he continued to deny ever touching them.A few min. later i found them in a bunch of his things and STILL he said he never had them and i said where i found them and he's like OH the birth certs.....You should have asked for those!! When I said i did he started screaming at me that I was lieing and that I asked for something else.
At that point he had already said something thast proved he knew what I was talking about.
And...this porn thing.... The first time i stumbled across porn I joked with him about it and he claimed it was his ex-wifes. I was like "ok sure"
But later he said he bet that I brought it in!!!!!
Then....with him still claiming it was mine i said "fine" and threw it away....the garbage went out as usual and then next thing I know i was sitting on the couch and caught site of the same tapes hidden under the entertainment center!!!!!!! When I asked him where they were he kept telling me they were in the trash. Then i said I KNOW WHERE THEY ARE so stop lying please!!! and he still stuck to the same thing....when i pulled them out, he once again said I put them there!
He does this a lot
It gets to the point that it almost seems like he seriously doesn't even remember what is truth and what is lie...
He watches porn...the REALLY raunchy stuff about 3-5 times a week, has it on his computer, a magazine in the vehicle and one in the house. Plus PPV when i'm not home. yet i would say I get a HUG MAYYYBE twice a week.....possibly two kisses a week if lucky.....and thats if I initiate it....other than that Nothing ....I have "tried" to leave and threatened to leave hgim and he begs me to stay and I have had serious conversations with him and he sincerely acts as if he doesn't want this marriage to be over....but he refuses to even TRY. He also doesn't like it when I go out to run errands because he says I'm gone for too long and he "never gets to see me" but the thing is he spends every second with his computer when i AM here!!!!
Sorry this is so long but I really did love this guy at one point and I still WANT to be with him but I don't know what to do