Controlling, Narcassistic, Degrading Husband
I am 21 years old and have been married a little over a year. I found out I was pregnant and both of us feeling pressure we decided to marry 2 months later. Nothing has been the same since we said "I do" and we already had a load of problems before we found out we were pregnant. I am now living with a man who constantly tries to dictate me like im his daughter, he cant stand when i do anything that i want to without consulting him first, he tries to control who i can and cant go see with my son (including family members on my side). We argue every single day all day. We are no longer intimate, he degrades me and talks down to me constantly. He is verbally abusive and says things to me that I have never heard anyone say in my entire life. His parents have characteristics like this that i have been exposed to just over the last 2 years of our relationship. I am worried this will never change because it is what he is accustom to. He does not think anything he does is wrong, and feels no where near bad when I am sobbing because of all the repulsive things that he says to me. Our son is only 8 months old and I dont know if i can be this unhappy the rest of my life or even for 18 years until our son moves out. All I feel I do these days is cry. I look at my baby boy and wish I could do better for him and I know how it is having your parents divorce, mine did when i was 12. I never ever wanted to divorce especially if I had children, and I still dont want to because i feel its better to live unhappy the rest of my life, so my son can grow up with a mommy and daddy together. At this point I am just lost, I have no idea what I should do so I am just looking for a little advice. I fear getting pregnant again because I couldn't handle having two children by him. He has no appreciation for all the hard work it already takes for me to raise a baby, I can't imagine what I'd go through with two.