Sex came back after separation...4 months later its gone
My wife and I separated in January for few months, due to many factors. We learned a lot about one another, a lot was let go of, and we have been much happier. A little bit before we reconciled, we became sexually active with one another again, barely keeping our hands off of one another. It stayed this way for a month or so into living under the same roof again, and has now dried up to where I am lucky to get it once a week. Our situation is as follows and serves as her "excuse", she runs a business from home, which is very time consuming, in addition to working an office job 3 days a week, and a 3 y/o. I help her with her business with all of the time I have left after taking care of the laundry, house, yard and child. It is all fine with me, and I enjoy doing it, but I need and expect at least a little sexual time in return. I am much more willing and enjoy helping more when I get it. I do get a bit resentful when there is a dry spell, but I can't return the dry spell on my duties, as it is not worth any headache. If I try to talk about wanting more sex, it goes bsck to being too busy, or her weight insecurity, which I am sensitive to, but she is beautiful anyway, or because she hasn't had time to groom. She will tell me to pleasure myself (in a nice way) because I shouldn't "back myself up". I always tell her, and this is true...I don't desire to do that, it doesn't do it for me anymore, I need her. When I do finally get sex, it may as well not happen anyway, b/c it is over quickly. When we were in a rythym, I was lasting longer and longer, something I have hard time doing. Now I have to start over again. During our separation, she fooled around with another man (bj), as we had the agreement that we could do whatever we desired, sure that we were done. I remained sexually dormant. The thing that did bother me about this, was the fact that she had not done this to me in a very long time, and the very week dhe had the green light, she acted on it. After doing that, she said she could never be with a guy with a small penis, and wished they were all like mine (and I am not bragging, as it is very average to me). I didn't understand why she would say that at the time, but when she later revealed doing that, it made sense.
So, what does a sex-with-wife desiring guy like me do? I veered down the road before, where I became a cyber cheater, and it was
the beginning of our downfall. I don't want to end up there sgain, and don't think I could. I just want to remain faithful, yet be sexually satisfied. I am hoping I don't leave my sexual peak age, as she is entering hers, and then the roles get flipped. That would be more maddening to me...as I reflected on my "good years" that got wasted.