a sad past few days

JeanInWaAugust 3, 2013

There is no joy
There is no hope
There is no beauty
There are no songs

There is just the man sleeping who, because he hates himself, believes I hate him too.

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he just told me to leave.

So, do I leave? Or do I stay until he comes to himself? This came out of the blue.

    Bookmark   August 3, 2013 at 10:03AM
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Do not leave before you talk to a lawyer. If you leave there is a good chance he will get the home and money if there is either. If there isn't, leave. I would not stay with anyone who did not want me AND I would not let him see how much he hurt me. Life's experience has taught me the best way to deal with this is just to say.............okay. It will leave him somewhat deflated/shocked.

    Bookmark   August 3, 2013 at 11:02AM
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Why should you leave. If he's unhappy and wants out of this relationship, shouldn't he leave?

    Bookmark   August 3, 2013 at 11:36AM
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don't know how it is where you live, but here a judge is inclined to 'give' the house & the children if there are any to the person who did not 'abandon the family home'.

Tell him adios & help him pack.

    Bookmark   August 3, 2013 at 6:29PM
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sylvia, I was going to say that but the last time I did I was really jumped. LOL In my state they call it abandonment and the first one to file usually is given the home at least temporarily. My lawyer said another judge does not like to over ride the judgement of the first.

    Bookmark   August 3, 2013 at 9:03PM
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Sometimes I wonder if this forum shouldn't change from the Marriage forum to the Divorce forum. Without even knowing the full story, many people just jump on with comments like "dump him/her" etc. It's easy - and dangerous - to give that kind of advice when you have nothing at stake yourself.

I think some posters on here are only relating to their own negative past experiences instead of reading and listening to the problems of those asking for help and educated opinions.

    Bookmark   August 6, 2013 at 2:57AM
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Scarlet I agree 100% and have said so many times...so often around here people are told to "dump him" because of things that sometimes could be overcome if both parties really worked on it. But there are a lot of scorned / bitter people around here that do tend to relate their bad experiences with everyone else.

It's so easy to dish out advice when you have no stake in the outcome.....

    Bookmark   August 8, 2013 at 1:11PM
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I think that Jeaninwa hasn't given enough information for anyone to give advice. Without knowing how long they've been married, or even if they're married, are there children, who does the house belong to, etc. it's hard to say what to do next. Could he be having an affair? Has he been distant and no intimacy? Only Jean can answer those questions.

    Bookmark   August 8, 2013 at 1:17PM
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Looks like she is not talking.

    Bookmark   August 8, 2013 at 2:41PM
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She's been talking more over at the Kitchen Table.

    Bookmark   August 9, 2013 at 2:48AM
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Well, sure. They serve coffee there.

    Bookmark   August 10, 2013 at 12:27AM
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