Marriage counseling works :-)

close_1972August 7, 2008

I wanted to share with the forum that my marriage is better: I'm happier, DH is happier, we can communicate effectively with each other now, and he has been keeping his temper under control. We are both more attuned to our own feelings and how our behavior affects the other person. This forum helped me with some personal stuff, and marriage counseling helped DH and I with the marriage stuff.

We went to marriage counseling for about 1 1/2 years, probably averaging every 2 to 3 weeks. Some of it was together, some separately. It's not over, but is definitely winding down. I'm amazed, and very happy, to be at this point. There were times when I didn't think it would happen.

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catlettuce

That's so wonderful! I'm so happy to hear it. I really wish I could get DH to go but he just has no interest at all.

I think the communication part is key, without that your just stuck. Good for you & your DH!!

~Cat

    Bookmark   August 7, 2008 at 12:02PM
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homemadecountrylife

Hello,
I am a lurker, but I have to add my 2 cents worth too :)

I am married to a verbally abusive husband and my depression was so bad I didn't want to live and divorce would be very messy. We have been married 7 years, and from what I am told 7 years can be the toughest and is generally the "make or break" turning point in a marriage.
So my last resort was to go talk to one of my associate pastors to be counseled. I have been going for a month on my own and didn't hide it from my husband, because I don't like secrecy, and things have done an almost 180 degrees. He didn't like it or agree, but let me go if I never asked him to go with me and I agreed. I love being counseled, and the biggest surprise is my husband is starting to change with me. I wish he would come, but he is proud and doesn't want a pastor to know that he isn't as nice as the general public thinks he is. He was vicious at home but in public he was as sweet as sugar and no one was the wiser. I didn't tell friends or family because it was embarrassing and I didn't think anyone would believe me because he was careful not to let it show.

I am an absolute supporter of counseling of any form or for anyone in a troubled marriage. Even if it's just to go and ask for advice once or twice, please do go, it helps to talk it out and get another opinion or point of view. I know my situation is unique and many men will never change, but if you can, please give counseling a try if you are able to go.

~ HomemadeCountry

    Bookmark   August 9, 2008 at 3:35PM
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