Controlling or Opinionated?
My husband tends to make decisions without including me. For example, he decided that he was going back to school, and didn't tell me until the weekend before he was going to start.
Most recently, his inlaws visited and he decided that he wanted his mother's above ground pool to put in our backyard. I wasn't involved in this conversation.
Often, I disagree with my husband about things he wants to do around the house, or when he tries to analyze me. When I disagree, he tells me I am controlling. But as I have thought about it more, it seems like I am just opinionated. Most of the things that I have disagreed with him on have still happened with him not considering how I feel. If I was controlling, wouldn't I fight for him not to do specific things until I got my way?
When I confronted him on some of these issues the other night, he told me once again that I was controlling. I told him that I felt that I should be involved on decision making that affects my life too because we are married with a child. He said that I just want to be in control. I got so frustrated that I started crying and he started laughing at me.
I walked away and he kept taunting me, asking me if I loved him. I told him that I didn't know. Soon after I went upstair to bed and didn't give him a kiss goodnight. I told him I was very upset.
This was two days ago and he is giving me the silent treatment. Basically, he pretends I'm not even in the house with him. It is very degrading. This has happened hundreds of time in our 4 year relationship and I would usually give in and apologize even when I knew he was in the wrong. But this time I am angry and I'm tired of being treated this way.
He always makes me second guess myself and in the past I believed something was mentally wrong with me and that was why he would get so mad at me. But lately I am believing that it is him that has a problem.
Please respond with some advice.