sexless marriage for a woman
thank you for sharing your experiences. I don't think I can live like this anymore. I will be married 3 yrs in Sept and haven't had sex since my 1st anniversary which is when we conceived our daughter. I am 31 and he is 36. He is on Lexapro since the month after we got married and had sex about 10 times in a year and haven't even shared a real kiss in almost 2 yrs. We went to counseling about a year ago because I have made it a point to tell him how unhappy I was and he said that it was because he knew that he could never satisfy me, that he feels because my ex Boyfriend was so great in bed he will never add up- I never told him he was, he just assumed because of my active sex drive and I guess "knowledge" I don't know- anyway from time to time he will grab my but but nothing NOTHING else. He can see me get out of the shower, in the shower and nothing. Its not like I have ever rejected him, I have told him that we need to work on it so that its not so one sided, and that we could use toys or something so that I can get something out of it too. well he told me that toys made him feel incompetent and that he hated the idea so he just shut down. I do not try anything because I am so resentful so bitter that my ego is so hurt that I don't even want to initiate anything. I can relate to some women here who said that they found prescription for months and they don't fill them, its like they don't give a crap. The counselor that he went to suggested a book- I read more of it then he did. He doesn't even talk about it, I guess I am guilty because I don't either, but I am the one that has ALWAYS addressed it. I just feel so let down because he doesn't even try, I have told him that he is like my roommate he hates that. There are a lot of things going on in our life now and he is overwhelmed with work and family (his family) that I understand but jeez a little roll in the hay might help relieve some stress :). Any suggestions? I told myself that this Sept - our anniversary ( of marriage and no sex) I was going to ask for a separation and see if that will kick his butt in to some action- no pun intended.