I don't want to back down
We are going back home to visit family and friends next week. I gave my husband the heads up (first time ever) that this time I don't want to see his dad. We are only going for 8 days after 3 days driving. I told him when he goes he can go by himself or with the kids but I want to stay with my family and friends instead. He asked why and I told him because I don't like his dad and so he said fine. There is a history there and it's not about me but how he was to his family in the past and it totally disgusts me (total selfishness nothing criminal or anything like that). My husband is the only one in contact with him still. Well, his wife just died last weekend so he called my husband (first time in 5 years which he also had to be reminded the names of two of our kids and that two more are in the picture now). Well, now he is making all these plans for us to stay with him/visit because he is alone. I am furious and started a fight with my husband saying no way. My parents/sisters/friends and his mom/sister all want to see us and we have spent weeks planning stuff. I told my husband he gets the kids with him for one day and that's it. He was mad about that but no way do I want to insult everyone else who have been involved to jump for him because he is having a hard time right now? We don't even know the man. I don't care how much time my husband spends with him but I want to keep the kids with closer family members as I know his dad will be going on and on about financial stuff and conflicts with her family (she was young when she died) and things aren't going over well with her family. Sorry for the lengthy post but it's to give a better idea. Of course, my friends are all telling me to stand up for this but that's because they want to see the kids so they are biased.