menapause, sex, paranoia, tired.
I am in post menapause and I have been feeling tired, depressed, not much desire to do anything, even sex.I do not sleep well due to sweats and bad back. I feel like sex takes too much energy.Even though I want it. My husband isnt very helpfull. He does not understand what I am feeling. Some days I am fine, and I feel like doing things , then another day I dont want to even look at what I need to do. I wonder if my depression and nondesire is due to not having sex, or meaninfull sex. He has sex, I am just there till he is done. I have gained weight and I do not feel sexy, and my hubby does not help me feel that way. I know he is taking care of business himself and that makes me feel mad. Like I want him to do someting for me but he does not like the fact that it takes me a while to get started. Then if we do have sex, it is over just as I am getting worked up.We went on vacation and never had sex the whole time. I feel even more upset that he does not care how I feel. All this is getting to me, I am finding that I do not trust him, I am checking up on him, his phone bill, what he has been watching when i am not home,videos, his computer. I feel like he is cheating on me. I work a full time job, clean the house, take of the lawn, cook the meals, and I am getting tired of him not seeing that I am tired.Oh he thanks me for all I do, OH WOW. We can not talk because he takes everyting as an insult. I even bought a book and he took that as an insult. I buy lubrications and he complains about that, one night he made the comment" hey old lady you are done, you are all dried up". That hurt.
Any way I am off to work, and i am still tired and fustrated. NO SEX, No comunication, no feeling like I am desired, or desireable.