Stay friends with Engaged Man or Not?
I have been internally struggling with something and I thought I would try this forum for advice and suggestions.
About a year ago, I met someone at a conference who was a friend of some of the people that I work with. We hit it off quickly, and although we did not spend every moment together, we spent enough time for me to start falling for him. He helped me with the conference materials (this being my first) and introduced me to people etc. Anyway, last day of the conference, we spent most of the time with each other and I was sad to leave. On my way back home, one of my co-workers told me that he was engaged. I felt completely blindsided and I asked him about it and he confirmed it. Hurt and surprised by the whole thing, I told him that it's best if we don't keep in touch. He said he was sorry he didn't tell me, but that he understood my decision, thought I was a great person, etc. I went about my business, tried to forget him but after about 4 months, we started emailing each other again. It's nothing inappropriate, just friends catching up. Then I saw him again in last month at another conference and the old feelings I had the first time around came back stronger. Sounds cliche, but I really never felt this strongly towards another person, it was very natural to talk to him and I felt we had a connection. Again, nothing inappropriate happened, there were times where we flirted but I was very careful not to show any of my feelings or cross any line. This time when I left, I was depressed, I cried all the way home. He was in a bad mood that morning too, he wouldn't talk or look at me. Anyway, I realize that whatever romantic feelings I have, I should forget since he's getting married in a month or so. I know I should move on, find someone else, etc. but what I am struggling now is whether I should stay friends with him. Am I just asking for trouble by getting to know him more? The fact is I do enjoy talking to him and he has become a good friend to me. I'm not entirely sure what to do, any advice would be so helpful! Thanks.