please help!!! what would you do in this situation!! please help!
My husband and I have been married for almost 7 years. We also have a 5 year old little girl. About a month ago, I was sitting at my husband's computer fixing a problem. After I finished, I went onto his myspace page and was looking around. Without even thinking, I went into his sent messages in his mailbox. I saw there that he had written a short letter to one of my ex-best friends. (Little background into what kind of person this girl is. She has two children by two different men. Shes single and VERY sexually active. She has lived with us (out of my pure generosity) about 4 times. I have seen her sleep with married men multiple times. She also enjoys sleeping with two men at the same time. Last year alone, she had THREE ABORTIONS! By THREE different men! And in my opinion, she is not the prettiest thing in this world. She is also a TERRIBLE friend. Hence the reason why she is an EX best friend. And she got that title BEFORE my husband did what he did. )
Anyway, I went into his sent messages and saw that he had sent her a message. I was just curious, because I TOTALLU trusted him. I opened the sent item and saw that he had told her "That pic is sexy as HELL!" I was SHOCKED! So I backed out and looked at the next sent message to her on his list. This one said "Where did you go? Melanie has left work and will be home soon." After reading this, I KNEW that something was up. So I went into his yahoo messenger and tried to look at his archives. Of course, they were empty. All of this time, my new best friend was sitting beside me and my husband was obviously pacing hoping that I wouldn't find anything. Well, being the computer hacker I am, I downloaded a program that will decode those hidden yahoo archives so that I can see them. By this time, my husband saw what I was about to do. Right when I got this program up and running, he started to violently PULL all of the cables out of the back of his computer and proceeded to take the computer tower out of the door and throw it in the back of his truck. At this point, I am SCARED and CONFUSED. Not knowing what happened was about to kill me. Later that night after much much maddness, he told me that he had asked her to have sex with him. He also said that he told her that I was LAZY in bed and that I didn't do it for him anymore. He has tried to lie his way out of this situation. He even DESTROYED this computer, (EXCEPT FOR HIS HARD DRIVE, HEHEHE). After all of this, he told me that he never meant it and that he would never have done anything with her. My philosophy is that if you make your bed, you sleep in it. It is hard for me not to bring it up as I feel nasty, used, strung along and not loved. But he gets SOOOO mad at me when I feel hurt and want to talk about it. He says that he is tired of hearing about it. PLEASE HELP!!!! I NEED AS MUCH ADVICE AS I CAN GET!!! I'm soooooo tempted to leave and get a divorce. I understand that he didn't actually do it but since he destroyed the computer, I feel that I am not able to get closure until I find out if everything that he has told me is actually EVERYTHING. Please someone!!! I need advice!!! Should I uproot my family?! PLEASE HELP!!!