i have been with my husband for 10 years and i feel confused about my feelings towards him.
I have always felt as if there are some things that i genuinely don't like about him. But he has been very devoted to me and done some really special things for me like stood up for me when other people have been unkind, comforted me when i am needy and bought me really thoughful gifts. We also have a young child together and he is a great dad.
I cannot say that i would consider him a friend. We do talk about intersting things and he is smart, educated and a critical thinker which i admire but I cannot talk to him in a way that i could talk to a friend. sometimes i feel like he doesn't really like the real me but the version of me that i present to please him. i am much more conservative around him that i am around my true friends.
he is also controlling and i often feel as if he has no respect for mine or anyone else's opinion. he is quite domineering in a conversation. he considers himself to be very smart.
He has a lot of positive qualities too but i often dream of a life away from him.
I wonder if i take him for granted and have a "grass is greener" mentality or whether i am just unhappy with him and would be better off finding someone that i am more compatable with.
I am also scared to leave unless i regret it in the future but the idea of being with him for the rest of my life depresses me.