Men are ????

RelationshipFebruary 23, 2011

I am a 39 woman, had couple relationships, and never married. Recently, I met a guy in a parking lot. He just say hi to me and have a short conversation. when I got into my car, he asked for my phone number.

The first day he call me at 11:30PM at night, I didn't pickup the phone, second day he call me again at 11:00pm at night. I didn't pickup the phone and block his number.

Why does he call me that late?

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tracystoke

Because he is drunk and feeling confident.

    Bookmark   February 23, 2011 at 8:51AM
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asolo

Do I have this right? You're 39, you say.....and you gave your phone number to a stranger in a parking lot? Not too bright.

Why does he call you that late? Because he has the phone number you gave him and he's a jerk.

    Bookmark   February 23, 2011 at 9:52AM
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suzieque

My question would be why you would give your number to some guy you just met in a parking lot? That seems extraordinarily unwise. And if you're going to not pick up the phone and block his calls, why did you give him your number in the first place?

What country do you live in or are you originally from? Is it Asia (just assuming from the way you write)? I'm just trying to determine whether customs are different where you are and whether women generally give out their phone numbers to someone the way you did (to a man that approached you in a parking lot and you had a brief conversation with). From what I know and where I live, freely giving your phone number to that person simply doesn't fly.

Now - to answer your question at least in part, who knows why he called you at 11 PM. That doesn't matter. Perhaps he's a night-owl. Perhaps he doesn't know any better. If you'd picked up the phone, spoken to him, and told him that you don't like to receive calls that late, or past a certain time, then I'll bet he'd have called earlier the next time. But because you didn't, he simply did what he did before. Can't blame him for that - that's something you could've changed.

Please take care of yourself.

Suzieque

    Bookmark   February 23, 2011 at 10:02AM
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suzieque

Asolo said in 2 lines what I spent time typing up in 3 paragraphs, and he said it better. So I'll change my answer - it's "What He Said".

    Bookmark   February 23, 2011 at 10:12AM
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scarlett2001

It's too bad, but you do have to be very, very careful these days.

Last night on TV I saw that women are most afraid of meeting a serial killer and men are most afraid of meeting ...somebody fat.

    Bookmark   February 23, 2011 at 11:38PM
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Relationship

Thank you all for your opinions.

first impression to get a woman or man, we have to be polite and profession. He had to call before 9:00

Friend of mine said at the beginning, if he doesn't call before 9:00 and call that late at night, He wants SEX. I was stun when she said that. I need your opinion if she's right.

    Bookmark   February 24, 2011 at 2:47AM
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colleenoz

Being polite and professional never includes giving your phone number to a stranger in a car park. What were you thinking?
To me calling after 8pm unless it's a dire emergency, is extremely impolite, whether you're looking for a date or just a chat.
Anyone who calls after that time for a date is, in my opinion, working their way down a list. They've called all the people they liked better, been brushed off, and now they're down to your name. If they were serious about a real date they'd call early enough to arrange something properly. Not very flattering, is it?
Your friend is not far off the mark. You're not this jerk's first choice, that's for sure.

    Bookmark   February 24, 2011 at 5:19AM
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asolo

Woman who gives total stranger her phone number in a parking lot now concerned about appropriate decorum?

How can one be alive for 39 years and have no more sense than this?

    Bookmark   February 24, 2011 at 9:04AM
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suzieque

Why do you even care anymore? You've didn't take his calls and have blocked his number. He's a non-issue. I think you should instead turn your focus on becoming a little (lot?) more alert to your own actions and what's wise and what's not. (Hint - giving your phone number to a stranger in a parking lot falls into the "not" category, no matter what culture you come from).

    Bookmark   February 24, 2011 at 9:53AM
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popi_gw

Don't give men in carparks your phone number.

You must protect yourself, and that is NOT a wise thing to do.

    Bookmark   February 25, 2011 at 1:07AM
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vala55

You need to sit down and watch a few Law and Order Special Victims Unit shows. it will make you think twice before you give your number to a stranger.

    Bookmark   March 1, 2011 at 5:16PM
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homey_bird

Ok, I think all of us are being a bit ...insensitive. Let me explain how.

I know that it might sound like a total surprise to people in America that someone who's 39 can be naive enough to give her number to a total stranger in a parking lot. Heck, a 13 year old will not do it; in fact I'll tell my daughter, a toddler, how not to respond to strangers.

But in a lot of cultures women are very very very protected. They used to be, until recently. Also, in many cultures, men would not approach a woman openly like that, and therefore being new in America where you see men and women mingle all the time, it can be difficult to interpret the signals. May be that's the case here.

OP has blocked his number now and she's trying to learn from experience. Please disregard the fact that she's 39.

So here is my advice:
- do not, EVER, give your number to a stranger. If someone asks, saying "I do not want to give my phone number" is perfectly acceptable. Saying no is not rude or impolite in this case. In fact, it's smart thing to do.

- good that you blocked him. He obviously is either stupid or drunk or a jerk or sex starved, or has worse intent.

- never ever give your phone number to someone unless you know him or her well. NEVER invite a guy over to your house unless you've known him well.

Hope this helps!

    Bookmark   March 16, 2011 at 12:18AM
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Bumblebeez SC Zone 7

Ditto what vala said. Throw in Criminal Minds too.

    Bookmark   March 16, 2011 at 9:43AM
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