Not sure what I should've done

chiefneilDecember 8, 2006

I was driving DD to school this morning when I saw a woman leading a dog by the collar, no leash. As I passed them, the dog got stubborn and started pulling back, then just sat down. Now watching in my rear view mirror, the woman is still pulling on the collar, but then kicks the dog!

Part of me wanted to stop and go yell at the woman, but honestly I didn't know what to do so I kept going and dropped DD at school. It's bothering me as I don't like to see cruelty to animals, but thinking about it I'm not sure that I could've done anything useful. Even if I yelled at the woman, what would that have accomplished, really?

What would you have done in this situation?

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doc8404

It sounds like she was out of ideas. Maybe stop and ask her if she needs a hand. It would be non-threatening and most likely wouldn't escalate the situation.

Almost everyone has a positive reaction to "Do you need help?" I sure all three of you (dog too!) would have come up with something you all would be happy with.

    Bookmark   December 8, 2006 at 10:55AM
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acoreana

Ugh, that would totally be eating away at me, too. :-(

She had probably caught the dog after it got away. My sis had a rescue with very bad habits, and escaping at all costs was one of them. She was probably so freaking mad that the dog could've gotten itself run over, and now was resisting that she lost it. Geeeeez, that stinks to have to witness. Poor puppy!

Saying something to her might've made her even madder, (and puppy's punishment more severe) but doc brings up a good point about asking her if she needs help instead.

As far as what I would've done...exactly as you did...and it'd be bugging the heck out of me...

Nat

    Bookmark   December 8, 2006 at 12:44PM
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bill_vincent

Most of the time, I get along better with dogs than I do people, and I don't know that I could just drive past if I saw someone kick a dog like that. The problem is that I don't know that I could offer to "help", either. Most likely, I'd end up making the situation worse, either by doing something myself, or calling a cop and pressing charges for cuelty to animals. I'd like to THINK that I'd act with a cooler head, but I know myself. I get way too emotional about dogs that are mistreated.

    Bookmark   December 8, 2006 at 6:10PM
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chiefneil

It just seems like a no-win situation to me. Doc's suggestion is a good one, and not something I would've thought of myself - I think the typical male reaction to something like that is anger. Like Bill, I suspect I would've made the situation worse. It really sucks, because now I don't know if that dog regularly gets mistreated or not, but even if it does there's nothing that I could've done about it on the spot standing on the side of the road.

    Bookmark   December 8, 2006 at 6:22PM
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Gina_W

I bet the dog got loose and the woman was in a panic, worried that the dog could have run into the street. How much of a kick was it?

    Bookmark   December 8, 2006 at 6:30PM
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paulines

Chiefneil, don't second guess yourself. I would agree that it sounds like Gina's scenario. I know when my kids were young and they made a dash for the street, I'd grab them and march them to safety, looking none too happy.

    Bookmark   December 8, 2006 at 9:01PM
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reno_fan

Ditto Paulines and Gina. Sounds like a dog owner at wit's end. I've looked none too thrilled to drag my dog's carcass home after he dashed outside! If so, that lady and the dog need more help than you could have offered on the side of the road.

I know when my kids were young and they made a dash for the street, I'd grab them and march them to safety, looking none too happy.

Paulines, that happened to me once. My 3.5 year old son bolted from the front door of my health club straight toward the very busy parking lot. My repeated calls for him to stop were ignored, and I was struggling to run after him while carrying his heavy sister in an infant carrier. By the time I caught up to him (in the parking lot) and took his arm, he went limp, allowing himself to drop to the ground. I took his arm as he was dangling himself and refusing to stand upright and proceeded the next few feet to the car. A woman approached me to tell me that she didn't have any children, and she really didn't know if she should be saying anything, but the way I was carrying him was very dangerous, and that I could hyperextend his arm.

Can I just tell you that it took every *ounce* of my resolve to not smack that lady? Had she seen where the kid had almost gotten hit? Had she seen me trying to run after him while struggling to carry an infant? No. All she'd seen was the last part. I fumed all the way home. I know she was (in her mind) "trying to help", but it was so judgemental and not at all helpful, and certainly not indicative of daily happenings. (Now that the kid is a teenager, I'm FAR more prone to child abuse....LOL! Just kidding.)

    Bookmark   December 9, 2006 at 9:05AM
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chiefneil

Well I hope you guys are right and it was a one-time thing from frustration. But I'll bet Reno_fan doesn't kick her kids while dragging them, no matter how frustrated she is. This woman wasn't just giving the dog a nudge, it was a pretty good kick to the ribs considering she was in an awkward position hanging on to the collar. Anyway, here's to hoping for the best.

    Bookmark   December 9, 2006 at 3:56PM
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