One of my brothers died this week. He was a very dear person and will be missed. He was a hemophiliac who couldn't take the clotting factor until just recently when they discovered how to tailor make one that wouldn't set off his allergies. He still couldn't take a lot of it but it kept him out of long term hospitalizations.
As he got older, he became more deformed from the bleeding into his joints and the muscle reactions to the volume of pain inside. Its been really hard to focus on the good he gave all of us - I wanted so much for things to be different for him. He was very frail. He slipped in the kitchen, hit his head which caused an intra-cranial bleed. They tried to save him by doing an operation to relieve pressure but it was unsuccessful. In the end, his standing instructions for not being kept alive by breathing apparatus took precedence.
As a tiny bit of comic relief, he died at a hospital in DC while living in Maryland. The DC Police are investigating as a homicide, so he may in fact be late to his own funeral.
As a second blow, another brother was hospitalized after having a stroke yesterday. He's seven years younger than I am.
I am so tired.