Joke for the kitchen remodelers

joepyeweedApril 7, 2009

Mr. Johnson wakes up in the hospital, bandaged from head to foot. The doctor comes in and says, 'Ah, I see you've regained consciousness. Now, you probably won't remember, but you were in a pileup on the freeway. You're going to be okay, you'll walk again and everything, but..... something happened. I'm trying to break this gently... but

the fact is... your penis was chopped off in the wreck and we were unable to find it.'

Johnson groans, but the doctor goes on, 'You've got $9,000 in

insurance compensation coming to you, and we have the technology to build you a new penis that will work as well as your old one did... maybe even better! But the thing is, it doesn't come cheap. It's $1,000.00 per inch.'

Johnson perks up at this!! 'So,' the doctor says, 'It's for you to decide how many inches you want. But it's something you'd better discuss with your wife. I mean, if you had a five inch one before, and you decide to go for nine inches, she might be a bit put out. But if you had a nine inch one before, and you decide only to invest in five inches this time, she might be disappointed. So it's important that

she plays a role in helping you make the decision.'

He agrees to talk with his wife. The doctor comes back the next day and says, 'So, have you spoken with your wife?'

'I have,' says Mr.Johnson.

'And has she helped you in making the decision?'

'Yes, she has,' he says.

'And what is it?' asks the doctor.

'We're getting granite countertops.'

Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

joe, I found this here in '04-'05 during my remodel planning, & posted it on the refrig. My DH NEVER acknowledged it.

I just sent it on to a good friend who will start her remodel in a few months.

Thanks for a good one.

    Bookmark   April 7, 2009 at 6:55PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

... "and by the way", said his wife, "granite countertops run $9,000"...

    Bookmark   May 12, 2009 at 5:10AM
Sign Up to comment
More Discussions
Barker Cabinets sample cabinet came today!!!
I am so excited to see the sample cabinet from Barker...
the cabinets are coming, the cabinets are coming...
some may recall the debacle with our cabinets. delivery...
Countertops for butlers pantry
We have a wall in pantry that will need countertops...
What does this tile say to you?
I am still in the planning stages of a small, U-shaped...
Anyone have Cambria Seagrove? Or Summerhill?
I have been GW lots lately trying to decide on countertops....
Lily Spider
Sponsored Products
WAC White 4" LED Recessed Light Shower Trim
Euro Style Lighting
Fabbian | Lei Steel and Crystal - Low Voltage Recessed Lighting
$182.70 | YLighting
Vertigo 1-lt Mini Pendant
LBC Lighting
Camargo Stainless Steel Tri-View Medicine Cabinet with Mirror
Signature Hardware
Possini Euro Crystal Strand 25 3/4" Wide Bath Light
Euro Style Lighting
Aurora Round 3.3 Inch RGB Accent Trim and Housing
People viewed this after searching for:
© 2015 Houzz Inc. Houzz® The new way to design your home™