Alternative to Paxil??
After reading the long thread about Paxil, and having weaned myself off it VERY slowly a few years ago (with slight problems), I find that my DH is still making me crazy!
His laid back attitude makes me stressed because I'm the person who pays attention to the details so things run smoothly for me/us and the household & pets.
I can't change him, so I need to medicate myself by way of my doc, or pop a vein. When I was on Paxil, it was wonderful, I was "evened-out" and while I noticed stressful situations and behaviors that I had to take care of (as the clean-up person at the tail end of the parade), those stresses didn't cause me the teeth-grinding they do now that I've been off Paxil.
I miss Paxil. I miss being calmer. Tea doesn't help, medication doesn't help. I don't want to get rid of DH because he does have his good points.
He is having some "pay attention" issues now that he's retired, and I feel like I am the person at the end of the parade, behind the ELEPHANTS, with a huge scooper to pick up the elephant piles and make things right again.
DH has been medically checked out, including his brain scanned etc, and he is just not paying attention to the things that I feel are important that make life run smoothly for me, like making sure his cell is on when I let him know I will call him about the status of, say, the plumber and what work is needed at our house, locking the doors behind him when he comes in, being very lackadaisical about things that affect me, the household in general, and the two cats and their well-being. He used to pay more attention to things before, which is why we had him and his brain checked out stem to stern.
I'm so frustrated and I know I cannot go on like this. My reactions to his behaviors are getting worse and more involved. If he lived on his own independently this stuff wouldn't bother me because it wouldn't affect me or anyone else. That's just the tip of the iceberg. My sis and I have emails with the subject line of: What DH did this time...
But I need help with something that isn't addicting or difficult to quit, based on people's experiences and not the insert in the medication bottle. When I first went to the doc and he advised Paxil and I took it, I had no idea of how hard it would be and how long it would take to get off of it. I even asked him if there came a time when I felt I didn't need to be Paxillated, how difficult was it to stop and he said it wouldn't be a problem at all if we went slowly.
I feel pathetic, but I also feel I'm going to lose my mental and physical health if I don't get a handle on the stress I feel. I thought about just changing my perception to not caring, but that didn't work. I DO care, and I do care about how his decisions or lack of them affects me, and I do care about other things too. Marriage counseling is not going to help--been there, done that a couple of times, got a lot of lip service from him, no changes from him, but changed how I perceive things and then realized THAT wasn't the answer (too detailed to go into).