How to deal with Christmas without my husband
I do not know how to do this. This is my first Christmas without my husband: I can't imagine not setting up a tree: but how to deal with nothing under it? How do I even decorate it without falling apart?
Christmas eve tradition was Swedish meatballs... I believe he would want that to still happen, our son and family live near by, it will be hard for me to do it, but Jer would want me to carry on. Meanwhile my daughter is in CT, and wants me up there with her kids for Christmas. Ideally she wants all of us to join her for Christmas Eve, Swedish meatballs, etc... It's a 6 hour drive from here.
I feel railroaded. Son is encouraging me to go to CT, he does not want me to be alone Christmas am....I am thinking of going to his place Christmas am, then catching a train to CT. These are all temporary fixes... I really do not want to go anywhere, I want to be here in my house but do not know how to deal with this. Every year we cut down our christmas tree. I can't not have a tree.
I want a new Christmas tradition that I can remember my husband and my kids and grandchildren can be a part of...
I really just want to take a nap and wake up in January. How do I ever get through this????