How did all of you do Thanksgiving Day?

ladonnaNovember 25, 2005

When I woke up yesterday, I was very down. Ended up crying, thinking back to last Thanksgiving. Remembering what my mom was doing last year at this time. Last year was a pretty tough Thanksgiving too, it was the first, since my dad had his heart attack and numerous strokes. We had to put him in the nursing home. This year though I wanted to make sure my dad had a speacial day with his sister. So my husband and I took my dad out of the nursing home, and spent the day with his sister, and her husband. We had a great day, i tried to keep my mind off the empty chair, and focus on who I still have in my life. I know my mom was smiling down on all of us. I was glad, that we had a good day with my Aunt, and to see my dad laugh and enjoy himself. So all in all, I had a pretty good day.

This forum and my friends I have made on the forums I belong to, have helped me so much thru my hard times. And I just want to say thank you and I am truely blessed to have all of you.

La Donna

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zshopper

I can sympathize with you. My mom and dad joined us for a Thanksgiving for the first time in 5 yrs. My dad had his legs amputated and is scared to leave his home for fear of getting sick. His is 83 yrs old and is very unhappy and bitter. Us kids found a way for my parents to join us because my brother bought a large house with a bathroom that can accommodate his bathroom necessities. Although all of us visit on every occasion and at least 4 times a week we were so excited to be altoghter this holiday season. We are 21 in all. Well my dad and mom came and he was so miserable that he was nasty to all and just wanted to go home. All the kids were wonderful to him but I'm afraid if he dies no one will have pleasant memories of him of how he treated everyone. I wish my dad was a nicer person, we all understand his disabilities and really try to accommodate him but to no avail. My mom is so wonderful and she is his sole caretaker but I guess he wants her legs cause he doesnt have his own. At least your memories of your mom are great ones and your dad made his Thanksgiving day a happy one, my dad doesnt know how to be happy and cannot enjoy life at all, how sad, anyway I'm glad you had a nice day.

    Bookmark   November 25, 2005 at 9:10PM
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ladonna

(((((((( hugs))))))))) zshopper Im sorry your day wasn't as good as you hoped it would be. My heart goes out to you.

    Bookmark   November 25, 2005 at 10:34PM
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alisande

It was the first time in over 30 years that I didn't cook for my family. My husband died last month, and it was hard for the kids and me to contemplate Thanksgiving. Eventually we decided that we would split up for the first time and I would go to two dinners: one at my son's girlfriend's grandparents' house, and another at my daughter's boyfriend's mother's. It worked pretty well, and kept me very busy all day. The weather was wretched, too, which kept my mind off other things. Still, it didn't take long to feel empty as soon as the day wore down. I hope next year the kids will come home for Thanksgiving again.

Susan

    Bookmark   November 26, 2005 at 9:50PM
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junemn

I was worried about my DD because it was her first visit here after her son died in our home. It worked out fine. I tried to keep her at ease and we did talk about my GS so he was not ignored. Seems like we are having a lot of strange noises in the room he died and we heard a knock at the door but no one was there. I spoke out loud and told him if he wants to stay a while that's okay with me. Might be something else but the idea of him joining us was a comfort.

    Bookmark   November 27, 2005 at 6:45PM
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socks

June, sounds like the day went as well as possible. I know your grandson was there.

You know what was on my mind on Thanksgiving? All the families--moms, dads, wives, kids--enduring Thanksgiving without a loved one killed in Iraq. My heart aches for them. It must have been a really rough day for those families.

Take care all.

    Bookmark   November 27, 2005 at 7:33PM
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angela59

My 13 year old daughter passed away in May. We cooked all the food the day before Thanksgiving and then had plates in front of the TV while we watched a movie on Thursday. It worked for us.....we still had the traditional food, but not the formal meal which would have been too painful this year.

    Bookmark   November 28, 2005 at 9:16PM
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lulie___wayne

We had a good day. I woke up a little lonely thinking about Mom and Christin not being here.
Our household is so different now. We used to wake up in the mornings and all four of us were here. There was the sound of laughter and the aroma of good food cooking. The table was set and we anticipated other family members to arrive later. It's just my husband and me now. The time is still precious, but it's not like it used to be. I guess that's how it is when the nest gets emptied.
We broke our family tradition and went out to eat for our noon meal with family. I cooked on Wednesday and we ate that dinner Thanksgiving night.
We visited Mom's and Christin's graves and I spoke to them and let them know how thankful I was for the very happy life that Mom gave me and for the wonderful 19 years that I had with Chris. I had the best daughter and mom. I tried to concentrate on being grateful for what I received in my life for having them in it. I am also so grateful for those loved ones whom I still have!
Overall, my day was good.
Lu

    Bookmark   November 29, 2005 at 7:12PM
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LizG1

I just need to get this out. My Thanksgiving was terrible. My mom just passed away in August after surviving 2 months from a stroke on the brainstem. On Monday night before Thanksgiving my father passed away after a year long battle with cancer. My husband and I were with him. Me and my husband were able to spend the holiday with my brothers and their families, but our small children were at home with my inlaws. We spent the day at my parents home, and no one mentioned a thing. And everyone was trying not to get the flu that was rapidly spreading through the family. We knew we needed to be there, and be together. But all I kept thinking about was my dad upcoming calling hours the next day, and the funeral on Sat. This holiday season is the hardest ever.

    Bookmark   December 3, 2005 at 1:08PM
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