I've started a tradition
Sept. 11 would've been my parent's 50th anniversary if my Dad had lived. He died in April of 2001, and I make it point to talk to my mom on important days like Sept 11, my dad's birthday, etc. I tell her that he's in a better place and while we all miss him, we will be together again someday. The important days in my family are still painful, especially to my mom, and she at least is always glad when they're over, but I think it helps to at least call her to see how she's doing. Last week, I reminded her of the life they had together and told her that NO ONE can take that away.