Healing can't be forced
I'm scheduled to record some of my poems at a radio station next week. One of the selected poems is one I wrote about my daughter Jill. I've written several about her, but never read them in public. This particular one is impossible for me to read aloud without crying, so I'm in the process of withdrawing that poem from the program.
A friend of mine thinks this is a bad idea. She thinks I should work on reading it aloud, because to triumph over this would make me stronger. I told her it doesn't work that way. Strength comes, but healing has to happen naturally; it can't be forced. I was able to write the poem, but I can't control my voice or emotions when reading it. Most peopleÂincluding my therapistÂthink I've come a long way and am fairly strong, considering. I've written lots about Jill and have shared my story in a number of ways. I even read some of her poetry to a group. So it came as rather a shock to have someone tell me that I'm chickening out over this.