precious memories

youngestdaughterAugust 2, 2009

I often find that I am filled with memories, sharp and clear, playing out inside my head; I did not ask to recall this just now, it came on its own. Should I be greatful for the recall or terrified that my own mind can take over my reality and replay things I have thought long forgotten?

Standing on my Fathers feet as he danced me around the room, '...and I could waltz across texas with you...'

The sound of Daddy whistling 'I saw the light, no more darkness, no more night, praise the Lord, I saw the light'...

My sister and brother sending me into the room to ask Momma and Daddy for a second cookie...

Daddy walking up behind Momma and hugging her, hearing her say to him, 'I love you today'...

Christmas dinners and fried chicken Sundays, root beer floats on Christmas eve...

Waking my Momma up in the middle of the night to ask her if I could sleep with them...

My Dad sitting with his head in his hands crying after his Dad died... feeling helpless to comfort him, I threw myself into his arms and cried too...

Momma making fudge and taffy and telling us stories about her childhood...

Daddy's eyes misting up as he heard 'the Star Spangled Banner'...

'Precious memories, how they linger, how they ever flood my soul, unseen angels in the midnight, precious sacred scenes unfold'

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mariend

Start a journal/scrapbook and write them down. Use pictures if you have them. these are memories to share or enjoy by yourself.

    Bookmark   August 4, 2009 at 12:28AM
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Maura63

I have been grieving the loss of my Mom for 16 months, and one of my "side effects" is having memories, like you do, that I don't think I would have recalled without the accompanying grief.

I have a poor memory to begin with, so I was amazed when memories I've long forgotten have popped back into my head -- usually fleetingly but keenly at the same time, and usually of my childhood. Sometimes they are triggered by something going on in the moment - but as I said I don't think I would have recalled without the accompanying grief.

I am grateful for these fleeting memories, but saddened that I can't ask my Mom more about them. However I use these memories as a way of getting to know my Mom better, and to gain insight as to the type of person she was, aside from being my "Mom"; I also use this as an opportunity to "talk" to her, maybe chuckle over the memory, or say, "Aha, now I understand."

I should write them down, as advised above.

    Bookmark   August 4, 2009 at 8:25PM
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youngestdaughter

Thank you Mariend. I do have a journal like that, simply titled things to remember. Oh its filled with the oddest things that pop into my mind!

Thank you Maura. I think you are right. These things would lay deep inside my memory if not for the grief like a spade, digging and prodding them out.

I am greatful for the momories, wish I could put them on video to some of the music that seems to have been the score of my life. Vicki

    Bookmark   August 4, 2009 at 8:34PM
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kms4me

Vicki,

I think your unbidden memories are wonderful. They all sound so happy, tender, and sweet. That is what keeps a lost loved one with you, those are the things that not even death can take away. Any parent would be honored that their child has such touching thoughts of them after they are gone.

Kate

    Bookmark   August 13, 2009 at 12:27AM
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fredacharm

Those sound like such wonderful and happy memories, Vicki, and very much worthy of a scrap book of pictures and hand written or typed out notes to go with them. This is what I am doing too. I have also asked family members and close friends to share their special memories of Mom with me, so that I can include them in this wonderful pictoral/text memory book that I can share with others who loved her and pass down to a grand child.

Memories of our loved ones are our precious treasures that we can hold onto in our hearts.

    Bookmark   August 14, 2009 at 3:51PM
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