Just when I thought I was doing better
This weekend, my sister and I went to my mother's house to sort through things and take what we wanted. I knew it would be hard, but I had no idea it would feel like starting the grieving process all over again. It's only been three months, but I had started to move through the process and, while my heart was still heavy and I could have sad moments, I had stopped crying and feeling like someone had just punched me in the stomach. Now, it's all back, fresh, new, painful, hurtful. I find that sometimes all I can do is put my head in my hands and cry. Completely unproductive, but I'm stuck. I'm angry all over again. While cleaning out mom's house I took lots of things that I knew would remind me of her, and would help me to feel close to her. However, I also found that these items keep me in tears. How do you get past this? It's like razor blades in my heart.