Very Productive Day

lulie___wayneJuly 16, 2004

I am really proud of myself. I worked non stop for hours today straightening, cleaning, and painting my pantry. I still haven't finished but I have really made a dent in it.

Even though I am grieving, I am going to do my best to continue on having productive days and also days that I allow myself to have fun.

Both my mom and Christin were very busy bodies. They both always had something going which was productive. They also both loved life and were happy. I guess I can keep their memories alive by doing the same just like them. It should not be too hard since the three of us are all so much alike. I don't want grief to stifle my life. They wouldn't want that, I know.


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Three chears for you Lu. That and God's grace helped me get through the first few weeks of losing my DH. I still depend on God's love and grace. I live in Texas (hot-hot-hot) and somedays I just have to get out in the heat and do yard work. I am so tired at end of day but it helps. You can just clean a house of one person only so much. I think you have done wonderful for what you had to experience.
God bless you

    Bookmark   July 17, 2004 at 9:32AM
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Thank you, Nan. I try, that's all I can say.
Well Nan, it's been 5 1/2 months now for you, right? Is it still really hard for you to come home to the empty house? Is it getting a little better? Are you involved with projects other than yard work and house cleaning? I just can't imagine what it would be like to live here without my DH! I know I take a lot for granted and in reality, I know that I could go before him, but with women generally living longer than men, the chance of me being widowed is great. Scary thought.
By the way, since I got side tracked with the movie this evening, I guess I'll work on the pantry again tomorrow!

    Bookmark   July 18, 2004 at 12:58AM
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Lu, you are inspiring. I have to wonder, how does one get the energy or motivation to tackle such big things during difficult grieving periods. I know that often, plunging ourselves into a big job can often be theraputic and help our minds get busy by focusing on these jobs. But getting the energy to begin seems overwhelming at times.

    Bookmark   July 18, 2004 at 8:26AM
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Believe me Deb, I've been wanting to do this for a long time, but I would just go and look in there and feel overwhemed. Same thing with a few other projects that I will do soon. I just decided that I have to do it a little at a time, one thing at a time. Using my time productively really makes me feel better in every aspect rather than just doing nothing. I figure at this time, I'm going to grieve anyway, so I might as well be doing something productive while I'm at it. I'm a very practical thinking person about most everything. lol
The fact that I have begun to get some of these way past due things done really lifts my spirits and has given me more energy.

    Bookmark   July 18, 2004 at 11:05AM
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Yes Lu, it has been almost 6 months since Mel went to God. It is a tiny bit easier, but still over powering. Someone mentioned to be that they were pleased that I had not just given up like a lot of people do. That I am so strong. Little do they know. I wish I could have given up and just stayed in bed forever, but I could not do that to his memory. He never even gave in and went to bed when his chemo and cancer really took over. Still handled business as best he could. I guess that is why God put so much on me after with 2 business to run and 4 employees. I had to stay busy to keep them going. But out of the blue, something will happen and WOW do I miss him. This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life. But there are some good to it too. It is hard to come home after being out and the hardest is still going to the grocery store. Mel did all our grocery shopping, He enjoyed it and had always done it for 44 years. So I put off grocery shopping as long as I can. But I know I can do this, because I have God to help me and that will get me through this. Thanks for asking

    Bookmark   July 20, 2004 at 8:51AM
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