Six years ago today

alisandeMay 28, 2007

My daughter Gillian died on Memorial Day six year ago. The holiday was also on May 28 that year.

When I first found this forum Lulie Wayne was here, and she had lost her daughter six years earlier. Six years sounded like such a long time to me then. I liked the idea of time as healer, but I didn't want to get farther away from my Jill.

Now, four-and-a-half years later, I can tell you that I look and feel quite a bit older, and I'll probably cry less today than I did back then (although the day is still young as I write this). But I still feel blessedly close to my daughter.

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Bless you, I've seen your posts, and I cry for all of us. Yes, I cry less, too, but after nearly 4 years, I still find the hurt so very raw. It truly is easier to bear, but so many things bring me up short. My thoughts are with you.

    Bookmark   May 28, 2007 at 8:28PM
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God Bless you, I am so happy for you that you can feel so close to your daughter after 4 1/2 years. I'm glad you posted a picture, she is so beautiful.
My loss is only six months and I still cry a lot, he died on Thanksgiving day and I am grateful that it won't be on the holiday every year.When people mention "years" I get so scared, I am afraid that his memory will fade and I don't want it to but this pain in my heart is so much to bear.
God Bless you and your beautiful Gillian.

    Bookmark   May 29, 2007 at 11:06AM
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God bless you. You've suffered losses these recent past years and yet you're still standing. What an amazing strong person you are.

Please forgive this lengthy tale, but to me this gives hope that our loved ones are always around though we can't see them.

My 29 yr old brother was killed in 1977 and it's hard to believe so much time has passed since his death.
I believe in signs,and I know you do, too. So let me share this with you.

I always wondered what he would have looked like as he got older and I almost got to see first hand.

I was at a social function with about 100 other people and found myself in conversation with an attractive gentleman that I imagined would be how my brother would look at this age had he lived.
As we spoke we found we had so many things in common...previous pet's names, childhood experiences, similar likes and dislikes.

He asked if I had any relatives in PA (we're from FL) and if I possibly had been adopted as a child because I looked like so many of his cousins. In fact, I looked as if I could be a part of his family. I don't have family there and I wasn't adopted.

I then admitted that I imagined my deceased brother would look like him if he had lived.
We went on talking and found we had many more common experiences than we originally found out about.
Then as a joke we asked each other for our birthdates to see if that was a commona factor as well.

I gave my birthdate first and he said his was different.
Then, he told me his birth date and I was stunned! I burst into tears and he couldn't understand why.
Turns out his date of birth and year were my brother's birthdate.

What are the odds of that happening? I feel this was a way for my brother to let me know he was okay. I feel I was blessed to have spent an enjoyable evening with my brother that night and it gave me a sense of peace.

And by the way, this man wasn't on the guest list. He was visiting a friend and just tagged along for the evening.

I hope each one of you who has experienced the loss of a loved one will receive a sign that all is well.

And after all these years I confess I still cry.

    Bookmark   May 30, 2007 at 8:10AM
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Thank you, everyone. Mona, that is a wonderful, unforgettable story. Thank you so much for sharing it. I think these signs must give everyone hope. Angels on earth...


    Bookmark   May 30, 2007 at 5:53PM
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Thanks for sharing, Mona and Susan. Susan your daughter was beautiful. Horses must have brought a lot of joy to her.

I remember Lulie too. You two have suffered a lot, and you both have helped people here because of what you have learned and experienced. Reaching out while you suffer your own pain is so very kind.

Take care.

    Bookmark   May 30, 2007 at 11:47PM
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What a beautiful story - thank you for sharing it with us.

    Bookmark   June 3, 2007 at 6:17PM
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