We just found that my mother had passed away last wednesday april 4th, she just had her birthday that monday to turn 48... It was so unexpected and i didnt even make it up to see her on her birthday. I just dont know what to do without her in my life. I have 2 children that were her life her world. My son is three and shes been taking him every week since he was born. It was so hard to explain to him that he cant see her anymore. She was actually supposed to come pick them up the day she passed. And thats just tearing me up. She had a lot of surgerys and so she was always in pain. I understand she doesnt hurt anymore but I cant help but need her back just to say goodbye. But I guess the worse thing is that I cant help blame myself for her passing, I was the hardest on her out of us kids. I always caused her so much pain growing up I think that maybe if I would have helped her lead and easier life she wouldnt have had that heart attack... Then before she passed I had decided that she needed a nurse in the house to help her with all her medications... She said no... I should have tried harder to get her one... Maybe things would have been different.. I really dont know how to go on and live my life anymore without her.. That woman was truely my world. My heart and soul and now I just have a huge empty space in my life that I dont think can ever be filled. Can someone please help me..... I really dont know what to do. THank you.