Loss of husband of 42 years

firebellMarch 4, 2013

I lost my husband 11/15/12. I feel like a part of me is missing. I cry all the time. The only thing that helps is shopping and I can only do so much of that. I have no one my age 63 that has lost a mate that I can talk to. It just does not seem to be getting better. Plus I am so angry at Dr.s One told us in may that there was nothing wrong with him to go home and not to worry about it. In August we found out he needed an organ transplant. I do not know how to get past the anger plus I miss him so much my heart hurts.

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I'm so sorry for what you are going through. I haven't lost a husband, I'm single, but I did lose the person I love the most this year. It feels like the life I had before is gone and I have to make a new life for myself but don't know how. So I guess i'm not much help, just know that you are not alone in your suffering, many are going through the same.
I am also angry at the doctors and at myself, I guess the only way is to feel that anger and cry but try not to dwell in those thoughts because they can't help you, just make things worse. As much as we would like to go back in time and do things differently, sadly we can't.
Life seems to lack joy now, I'm just trying to live one day at a time and have patience with myself. It will never be the same, but we are still here and there's nothing to do but keep moving forward. I like to think that everything I do is moving me one step closer to see Mom again.
Sorry if this was no help. I send you a hug and try to think in the good things you shared with your husband, how blessed you were to have met him and love him and be loved in return!

    Bookmark   March 5, 2013 at 7:18AM
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I would urge both of you to consult a grief counsellor. Not only will you be able to talk and work through your anger and grief, but s/he will be able to suggest some coping strategies to get you through to the "acceptance" phase of grieving. It will not be a quick fix.

    Bookmark   March 5, 2013 at 6:17PM
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I'm so sorry firebell, I am dealing with the same loss at your age. We were married 41, but its been 18 months now and its still very hard. I also cry daily. We just have to work & cry through it. There is no quick fix. I also did a lot of shopping an staying away from home as much as I could. But now I don't know what to do. I've done all I can. People just love to give advice but until they have been through it they don't have a clue.

I hope things will get better for all of us.

    Bookmark   March 6, 2013 at 6:01PM
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How are you doing firebell?

    Bookmark   July 6, 2013 at 6:30PM
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