Grieving again (pet)
I had to have our family dog, Mandy, put to sleep yesterday. I was plowing snow with a farm tractor and she ran underneath the front wheels. I was backing up, looking behind me and never saw her. I feel terrible and breaking the news to my daughters was pretty traumatic. Even though they don't blame me and intellectually I understand that it was an accident, I am still wracked with guilt.
Mandy was about 15 years old, but had been in relatively good health. She was nearly deaf and couldn't control her bladder anymore, but otherwise, she was in good spirits and got around pretty well. She's been a loyal and great companion to me all these years and I feel like I let her down. I had always hoped she would just pass, peacefully in her sleep. I never imagined something like this would happen.
I hesitated to bring this to the forum. So many folks here are dealing with the death of loved ones, under some very tragic and heartrending circumstances. Having lost my Dad a little over a year ago (and subsequently finding this forum), I am very sensitive to that. But I also know that the people here are very compassionate and frankly I could use a little sympathy right now.
As always, thanks for listening.