The Wind Beneath my Wings...

babs77February 15, 2008

My Dad was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Luekemia in September Â06 and fought a hard battle. After traditional treatments did not help, he went into an experimental program in which he knew his odds were very, very low but he said he did it in the hopes that someday it would help others. I am so very proud of him. This experimental program turned out to be a nightmare for him. I wonÂt go into the details, but suffice it say it was a horrific experience. But we eventually got him stronger and back home where he wanted to be.

When I was a young single Mom I contracted Shingles. I had reservations for a plane trip home the next week. Called my parents to tell them; they were worried about me getting on a plane sick, with a newborn. We were having a 3-way conversation when my Mom said "Let me and your Father get off the phone for a few minutes and talk about this and weÂll call you back." An hour later I was still waiting, so I called back and Mom answered the phone and said "HeÂs left." "Left for where?" "To come get you." Silence "Mom, he DOES realize this isnÂt like going around the corner to bring the newspaper to Grandmas house right?" My parents lived in NJ and I lived in Boulder, CO at the time! 1,800 miles away and it was after 11pm when he left! She said "We got off the phone, he looked at me and said, start making me some sandwiches while I pack." Mom said she knew better than to try to talk him out of it when she saw the look on his face. She said he was out the door in under 10 minutes.

My Dad was 75 and had stayed friends with people he knew since he was a small child. The friendships have endured all these years. I was great to see them all turn out in tribute to a great man. His funeral was amazing. The place was packed! He was dearly loved by so, so many peopleÂ

I got married a few years after the NJ/CO trip. At my wedding, my Father/Daughter dance was "Wind Beneath my Wings." I had it printed off and framed nicely for an X-Mas present for him the following year. My Mom said when he opened it he just sat there quietly looking at it.

Yes, my Dad is my hero. Ever since that night he got in the car and drove 1,800 to rescue my and my newborn son heÂs been "the wind beneath my wings".

Sorry for the long post. But it felt good to "talk" about him. I miss him so very, very much.

Did you ever know that youÂre my hero,

and everything I wish I could be?

I can fly higher than an eagle,

Âcause you are the Wind Beneath My WingsÂ

Here is a link that might be useful: Wing Beneath My Wings

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Dora Vann Snider

What a sweet story of your dad and your love for him. I cried as I read it because it reminded me of my precious dad and how much I loved him. He died in 1985 at the age of 66.

It reminded me of my DH driving 75 miles in a blinding blizzard because our DD was returning from Dallas and had slid off the road on I-40. It was in the middle of the night she called from a quickstop in a small Texas Panhandle town scared out of her mind and didn't know what to do. This was before cellphones. A trucker had taken her to the little store to call home. Her dad got her and brought her to our home. Both of them were sick from being out in the weather, but she could have said, like you, that he was her hero. She has never forgotten that incident. There was no doubt in her mind how much he loved her.

Thank you for posting. It was so inspiring. Your Dad was so special, wasn't he?

    Bookmark   February 15, 2008 at 10:45PM
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Babs, what a great story! Your dad was truly not only a great father, but a great human being. To have so many friends, especially through all of those years is a testament to his inner beauty. Love transcends time and this shell of a body we inhabit here on earth.

He is still proud of you and will always love you. Always.


    Bookmark   February 17, 2008 at 12:21PM
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Thanks for the kind words. Yes, my Dad was very special to me. He, and my Mom, were amazing parents.
My next youngest sister is severally mentally handicapped and lived with my parents her entire life. It's been a hard life for my parents. My Dad's worst fear was of my Mom being left alone with my sister -- we all knew that wasn't possible and the day after he was diagnosed they started looking for a group home for her. It was a long, difficult struggle, but the call came the day my oldest sister and I were bringing Dad home from the Hospice Hospital. They had found a placement for her! I'm sure the relief my Dad must have felt with tremedous. His last piece of unfinished business was now complete. My sister and I took her to her new home a few days after my Dad got released from the Hospice Hospital. Returning back to my parents house, we both sat down with him and told him she was now taken care of; that he didn't need to worry about it any longer. I told him this several times throughout the day and he would squeeze my hand and turn his head toward, I knew he understood what I was telling him. He died a few hours later.
I truly believe he was holding out until this unfinished task was taken care of. That he could leave now knowing my Mom and sister were okay.
I was totally numb through the holidays and his birthday and feel like I'm just now coming to grips with this all. I worry so much about my Mom and my sister. My sister has had many difficulties adjusting -- she doesn't understand what death means and keeps asking for him. It's so hard on my Mom.
It'll be six months soon and I feel like I've just now begun to grieve.

    Bookmark   February 17, 2008 at 2:49PM
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I, too, recently lost my Dearest Daddy who I love and miss.
He was also "The Wind Beneath my Wings". It has been a month since His passing and the first Easter without Him. My daughter misses him greatly. We brought him his Easter Basket and left it at the grave along with "our" traditional Easter breakfast. Lovely tulips were planted there. We all gathered at the grave and told him the things we were thinking of that day and our hope to see him once again in Heaven.

Although he was 86 years old, his passing was a shock to us. He suffered with some chronic ailments but nothing so serious as to think we would lose him without warning.

As each day passes, the realization sets in that we will never see our Darling Papa again on earth and this is the most difficult part to come to terms with.

As I have a belief that includes an afterlife known as Heaven I have been reading about what that place is like and so I feel some comfort in believing that my Dad is in a beautiful place. A place much lovelier than anything that I have ever been acquainted with. I know that He is Happy there and filled with Joy! He Loved People. He, too, missed those that passed on and He is with them. They have so much to catch up on. He will be so busy for a while.

I wondered, too, if those who pass know what goes on down here with us and according to what I learned, they can. I was so very happy to learn that as well.

At present, I still feel numb. It is very difficult to catch hold and process that I will never see my Daddy again here on Earth. I will never be able to call him. He can never help me when my car is stuck. (He would come running to help when needed). He is a good, strong, patient, selfless and loving man and the world will be a sorrier place without Him. But, I am forever thankful for Him and the decent qualities and attributes that were a part of his makeup. They don't make them like that anymore!

I think that no matter how hard it is for us who suffer the loss of someone we Love we have to keep trying to live our lives out to the fullest. To be patient and faithful and more compassionate to others as a result. We will eventually learn from this and come to realize how fragile and finite we all are.

Each day little thoughts and memories of my Dear Daddy come to mind. How he loved the Holidays and made them so festive. How he enjoyed his grandchildren and how they Loved him for the joy he brought to them.

It amazes me that when I think of my Dad the strongest thing I feel about Him is the Love.

Love never ends.

I know that we will meet again and the circle of Love will never end.

    Bookmark   April 5, 2008 at 11:38PM
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My husband truly was the wind beneath my wings though i didn't realize it untill i lost him. He took care of me through breast cancer and chemothearpy he never left my side and always caring about me. this is why my grief is so hard his pancreatic cancer was'nt found untill to late and i feel so guilty for not being able to take care of him as he did for me every night i ask his forgivness and tell him how much i love him will this pain ever go away

    Bookmark   April 6, 2008 at 1:55AM
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I am so sad that you suffer so with these feelings. You have no reason to feel any guilt. The untrue guilt does not allow you to mourn the loss of your dear husband and you need to do that without this unfounded guilt. There was nothing you could have done to stop what happened. That is the truth not the lie of guilt.

What a wonderful and loving husband he was to you. Cherish that thought and the Love that was the catylist for his goodness to you.

His goodness should be the ultimate truth of how Lovable you are as well. To be loved dearly by someone is a gift.

I don't know what the future will bring to me as I process my own bereavement as everyone mourns their loss in a unique and personal way.

If it gets really bad and you are greatly suffering I hope you will reach out to someone. There are places that offer assistance often for free. I found one at a hospital near where I live and if I start to feel really down am going to participate in it.

Best regards.

    Bookmark   April 6, 2008 at 8:11PM
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