Baby shower ettiquette, rsvp and bringing uninvited children
My best friend is throwing me a really nice all woman baby shower in one week. She sent out the invitations many weeks ago but has not gotten RSVPS from everyone. I asked my mother-n-law (she also has not rsvpd but I know she is coming) about her 2 friends who were invited. She said, "Oh, yes they are for sure coming. In fact one asked me about what they should do with her two year old and I told her to just bring him." I was shocked, not because I don't want one two year old at the party but because almost everyone invited has children and if they all came there would be over 12 small children which would be a lot of extra work for my friend who is throwing an elegant type shower at 3pm on a Saturday. I told my MIL that we weren't inviting children because I didn't want to tell some people yes and some people no. It doesn't seem fair. But my MIL didn't offer any ooops or sorry or I will call my friend. Now I feel stessed. My friend, the host, told me not to worry about it (in fact she has a two year old that won't be there) but I am also worried about other guests who might wonder why they weren't told to bring their children. To add an extra twist I did invite my own nieces who are 5 and 7 but I am VERY close to them and want them to feel a part of this pregnancy and baby and I know that my sister will watch them and they do not run wild. Also the host knows my nieces and extended the formal invitation to them and she has planned an extra surprise for just the two of them. So what should I do now? I feel that my MIL should have told her friend, why don't you rsvp and ask the host? So now they are planning on bringing one extra and haven't even rsvpd. Should I tell my MIL to tell her friend that she made a mistake and take a chance that it will offend someone especially when they see my nieces there? On the invitations it was only addressed to one person, not the family. I do realize that by not extending the invitations to all children in the family that I run a risk that a mom might not be able to come and I understand that completely. Thanks for any suggestions.