Signs of a bad guest...

jadiesmomJuly 5, 2007

Following up to Ilovepink's bad hostess post...

As I was responding to her question about bad hostesses - I realized I was responding to signs of a bad guest - so I thought I would start my own thread.

Mine are...

1. Guests who arrive early - One of us is usually getting dressed or my fiance is fininshing up with the food and he usually gets stuck talking to them while we are getting ready.

2. Guests who keep you waiting - I hate waiting for someone who doesn't call to say they are running late. In one instance I waited over 45 minutes for my dad before we started brunch and when I called, he said he wasn't coming.

3. Guests who "help" clean up - While I appreciate the help, my in-laws always get up immediately after dinner and put everything away - regardless if it is food that needs to be refrigerated or not, and it rushes everyone out the door.

4. Guest who eat and run - My in-laws again...Why have I spent the past week cooking, baking, cleaning, setting a beautiful table when you are here 2 hours and then leave? I love socializing and catching up. They are in a hurry to eat and leave to go right back home!

5. Guests who go into a bedroom door that is closed - Obviously I didn't want anyone in there or the door would have been open.

6. Guests who don't RSVP - this is my number one gripe!

7. Guests who bring extra kids to my kids' birthday parties - I hate having to scrounge up extra goodie bags or paying for kids I don't know or didn't invite.

8. Guests whose kids trash my kids' room and then leave - your kid helped make the mess the least you can do is have them help clean up.

I'll stop there for now...anyone have any more??

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When people dont RSVP it makes me insane. I have come up with a plan that has helped somewhat. When it is a childrens party i will give invites to the class 2 1/2 weeks before the party. The Monday before the party i will send out RSVP reminders asking to call by that night. On the reminders it also states that parents must call to insure that the child actually has permission to attend. Alot of times kids will tell each other that they will be there when in fact they are not going. I have had parents call at 9pm the night before the party and not show. I have also had parents make there 5 year old child call. I love that! However the reminders has helped. I have never had someone bring extra kids to the party (knock on wood).As for adult parties usually more people attend and they did not RSVP. It seems to be the same people every year. Its very frustating!

    Bookmark   July 5, 2007 at 5:44PM
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My favorite is guests who have (unknown to me / untold to me) dietary restrictions that result in their not being able to eat what I'm serving. I have no problem altering menus or providing special plates or expanded variety but I'm not clairvoyant.

    Bookmark   July 5, 2007 at 7:20PM
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1. When guests do not rsvp:

a. To the phone number that you have printed on the invite.

b. They let the person who the party is in honor of know they can't make it but they don't tell the hostess.

2. When guests bring children and they were not invited.

3. When guests start political debates or intense conversations at the dinner table and the hosts and hostess have tried to nicely end the discussion.

4. Guests that bring their personal business to the party. If they were fighting because they were lost and then arrive and are still going at it or letting everyone know.

    Bookmark   July 5, 2007 at 9:03PM
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No, the worst is people that RSVP that they ARE coming, and then DON'T. Grrrr...

    Bookmark   July 9, 2007 at 9:35PM
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I can top that.

They RSVP no they can't make it. Then they call the day of the event and say they can make it. Can they still come? ANd bring x amount of people.

You had the catering number in a week a go for a reason.

    Bookmark   July 10, 2007 at 12:11PM
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I think we all agree that failure to RSVP is probably the number one bad guest move. And that includes all of the last minute/unexpected guest/change of plans variations on boorish behavior out there.

Ninos, I think it is fantastic that somewhere out there, there are parents teaching their kids how to RSVP. Gives me hope :)

    Bookmark   July 11, 2007 at 3:44PM
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This is a cross-post from last year, but opened up old hard feelings. These people are on the West coast and we are on the East coast now.

Couple attended a couple of parties at our home. Husband was a joke-teller and consumed quite a bit of time doing so. His DW was in my "girls group" and opined at one time how difficult it is to have a holiday dinner w/o grandkids, etc. since most people have them and we don't. On that cue, I invited them to our house for Thanksgiving. They were going away for her birthday but thanks. Weather there turned lousy and they came home. She called the day before Thanksgiving and asked us to her home. I said that I had already bought everything so why not come to ours. Well, they had already asked others to theirs. We spent TG home alone.

I brought this up to a GF who said that maybe the husband was uncomfortable at our home, but I said that he didn't seem uncomfortable telling jokes to our other guests for an hour or so....

Fast forward; her sis and BIL were visiting from Europe. She called and asked my DH to schedule a golf game a few days hence, which he did. Then, since I hadn't heard from her in the meantime, I called the evening before to confirm the golf date. She said, "Oh, they aren't playing." No thanks, or KMA or nothing.

The last straw was a discussion about storage of seldom used things (party items, etc.), and she said that they had just recently had a Christmas party with 60 people(we were not invited).

It hurt like he!!, but at least I'm old enough to realize that $#!+ happens and I think if she ever knew how hurt I was, she would be devastated. I just think she didn't have a clue, even though they are very socially connected and well liked.

    Bookmark   August 11, 2007 at 7:38PM
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