Guests always bring along a dog

Don_June 26, 2003

How would you handle this? My wifes long time friend and her husband come to visit occasionally and spend the night. They always bring along one of their dogs. Their dogs are not well trained and are a royal pain. My wife doesn't want to upset her friend but my nerves stand on end. I am not a dog hater and in fact I like them but these animals are not well behaved and are fed from the table. Please give me your thoughts!

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If it's a long time friend and they only stay one night, I would just grin and bear it.

    Bookmark   June 28, 2003 at 8:40AM
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Hey Don,
When they come go out to eat. I personally do not want another persons dog in my house. If I wanted a dog I would get a dog.

    Bookmark   June 30, 2003 at 5:14PM
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We have 3 dogs, who we love like children, but we would never bring them unannounced to anyone's house, even though they are very good. It's just rude. That said, I'm not sure I know how to handle such a situation. Obviously, the dogs have been tolerated before, and I'm assuming nothing has been said about leaving them at home before. I'm also assuming that the other dogs are left at home with a petsitter or something, since you said that they bring one of their dogs. Maybe if you said that the one dog they bring would be happier at home with the other dogs the frinds would get the message? Telling them in advance, and adding that you are planning to take them out for dinner (great suggestion britbritmay) could deter them from bringing the unwelcome critter. It's really difficult to broach the subject to the friend now that the situation has been tolerated before. It should have been addressed the first time.

    Bookmark   September 28, 2003 at 12:04PM
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they only bring one? what's the matter- they're so unruly that they can't leave them together for the night?

my attitude is thus...a child under my roof is under my roof- and my rules. I do NOT care if momma lets you at home- this is not your home, and if you want to play by momma's rules, stay at momma's house.

ditto for dogs- and yes, I have confined visiting dogs to the sun porch (this upset the owners far more than it upsets the dogs, let me tell you) for the duration- or to the guest room (let them shed on the pillow that mommy sleeps on)

but I'm a hard woman with few (though very close) friends.

    Bookmark   October 6, 2003 at 11:16AM
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Get a cat; that should put an end to it. Or tell them you've developed allergies and to please leave the pooch at home.

    Bookmark   October 11, 2003 at 12:43PM
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Just BORROW a friend's cat for the night----and tell them you have a their dog WILL HAVE TO STAY IN THE CAR!!!!!!


Or offer to put them up in a cheap-o hotel....maybe they'll leave poochy at home.

    Bookmark   February 14, 2004 at 12:52PM
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Wow....does nobody use the "little white lies" trick anymore?

Simply have your wife say that you've visited your family doctor for your long time sinus problems and he's pinpointed it to an allergy to dog dander.

No doggies in the house!

Problem solved, no one's feelings hurt.


    Bookmark   May 10, 2004 at 2:17PM
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Does nobody tell the truth anymore?

Why not just say, very politely, "please don't bring the dogs". You don't need to offer reasons other than to say you'd prefer not having the dogs included.

    Bookmark   May 12, 2004 at 1:35PM
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Amen to Jenn. Just tell them the truth. They are friends... no?

    Bookmark   June 9, 2004 at 11:19AM
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That particular friend is severely lacking in common courtesy and manners!!! If it is a "good-enough-a-friend", have a "hart-to-heart" discussion about the dogs.
If they truly are good friends...they will understand. If this doesn't work, LIE unabashedly about allergies!

All I can say is WHAT GALL! Did they ask if they could bring a dog in the beginning???? Is their company that valuable to you?

    Bookmark   June 26, 2004 at 7:53AM
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In a lame attempt to keep peace, I'd lie too saying someone in the house had developed allergies.

    Bookmark   July 14, 2004 at 1:36PM
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My FIL has a dog and the first time he showed up with it at my house, I said it had to stay outside. It also was untrained and we had wood floors that i did not want scratched up and off white new upholstry that i did not want soiled. he never asked again and just puts her outside when he comes, and that works fine.

Perhaps you should get a cat and then you would have a great excuse why the dog can't come. We did, but not for that reason. I am just a person who adores a cat.

It is kind of like the couples who always bring their young children to adult dinner parties, and are clueless. That actually wouldn't bother me but it bothers some people. My one SIL used to do that all the time to her friends.

    Bookmark   September 23, 2004 at 11:03AM
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As I see it you have 2 choices.... one endure the dog....or 2 tell them they can't bring the dog and stay at your house....and they will likely never visit again.
You have a choice to make....either absence of dogs....or absence of's up to you.
Linda C

    Bookmark   September 29, 2004 at 10:11PM
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While I have 3 dogs I could never imagine even if I wanted to take them somewhere that I wouldn't ask first. I remember when we had gotten 1 as a puppy we had to be around allot for training purposes. We were invited to a friend's home & we declined the invitation b/c we wouldn't invite ourselves over with a dog, especially one that wasn't trained yet & could not leave her alone for long periods. They told us to bring the 2 dogs we had over. I used to be roommates with the woman so she knew I'd be right on top of my dogs & would clean up after them. It all worked out fine & no accident, but I can't imagine anyone just assuming they could bring their dogs AND if they are so rude to do so then I wouldn't care about hurting their feelings & telling them you'd really prefer they not bring their dogs. They can come sans dog or not come, period.


    Bookmark   March 13, 2005 at 7:26PM
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I don't want dogs at my house either, and I am having a party this week-end and have decided not to invite those that I think would bring dogs. If they were good friends, it would be one thing, but we are inviting people from work that we know only casually. I had thought about adding "no dogs" on the invitation, but it seemed more tactful just not to invite those that cannot go anywhere without their dogs.

The losers are the ones who cannot leave their dogs at home - not me because the friends I care about are considerate. I will also not require anyone to remove shoes to come into my house - the party will be mostly outdoors anyway, and my floors are easy to clean.


    Bookmark   June 24, 2014 at 1:52PM
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Buy a nice big python and take it along when you visit those dog friends.

    Bookmark   June 25, 2014 at 1:43AM
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