Did we jump the gun?
Kevin and I had a very difficult trip to Texas, and we thought that our mother was going to have surgery while we were there. Unfortunately, that did not happen because she was not well enough, due to dehydration, etc. We left Texas expecting her to have the heart valve surgery this Wednesday, but today we got a call from our sister to inform us that our mother has advanced cancer (somewhere in her abdomen) and that the surgery has been cancelled. At this point, they are merely taking care of her to make her as comfortable as possible until she dies, and no one knows when that will be, although the current estimation is in days instead of years. We had been told that the heart valve surgery would add 2-3 years to her life, but now she has only 2-3 weeks, or so is seems. She may not last another week. In any case, we will next return to Texas for her funeral, and she is already picking out what she wants to wear and whom she wants as pall bearers.
I left work today at 3:00 PM when I got the news, but I think I will feel competent to work again tomorrow. I saw my surgeon this morning and learned that my own surgery went extremely well, and I will see my regular doctor tomorrow after work. My surgeon wants a 3 and 6 month check of my calcium levels.
At this point, I can hardly feel like I am getting back to normal after my surgery. I took my last antibiotic pill this morning (These pills made me extremely tired and lethargic), but I do not feel like a new person, as I was led to believe that I would. I have to wonder whether we should have stayed another week. I think we did accomplish quite a bit the week that we did stay, but Mother was very upset to see us go when we did. I am positive now that I have seen her alive for the last time. We talked with her a bit on the phone yesterday, but she was becoming too weak to speak more than just a few words.
Anyway, depressing as it may be, I thought I should give you this update. I apologize for the dire thoughts/messages I have been posting, but do appreciate your very kind responses. If I seem distant or strange to you in the near future, at least you may know why.