I just don't know how to title this thread. Frustrated is just one of many emotions I feel.
As you know, Mother is 95 and mentally alert, very few signs of mental decline at all. She's extremely frail, and losing weight over the past months, down to 79 from 88 in April, altho this last week she was stable. She is slipping away.
She is miserable. She hates the nursing home with a passion. She is whining about everything from the fact that the CNAs do not hang up her clothes properly, they only give her one sennakot laxative instead of two, no one answers her call bell, etc. She cries a lot, she wants to die.
It's hard to even talk to her because she refuses to wear her hearing aid. Forget any soft-spoken death-bed scenes. I close the door and yell. She tells me all her problems, usually related to constipation, but if the charge nurse looks in on Mother, Mother just says that everything is fine.
So the last couple of days have been short ones for me visiting, less than 4 hours. Tonorrow is a 'normal' day. She does not want to do anything, no TV (I watch the cooking shows and read), nothing. There are Catholic communion and rosaries three times a week. If I ask her if she wants to go, she will say no, so I just take her downstairs anyway, and she seems to enjoy the services.
There is nothing graceful, peaceful or serene about my mother. She whines and cries. And I don't have the faintest idea what to do. Can't talk to her, not without yelling. Will discuss raising the anti-depressant dosage tomorrow, altho she has only been on it for 3 weeks, so maybe it just has not kicked in yet.