Father w/dementia, won't give up drinking (long...)
My 87 yr. old father has dementia and a drinking problem. We noticed in the past few years that he has been drinking alone, earlier and earlier in the day, hiding his glass in a cabinet, for instance. Two year ago we took him to a neurologist who bluntly asked him if he would give up alcohol to have a better quality of life. He said "No," very emphatically. So, as a result he is spiraling down faster and faster. He doesn't eat well, starts drinking around 2 or 3 PM every day and is passed out by 6:00PM. He then sleeps it off for a few hours and wakes up and announces it's time to get up. He sometimes forages in the refrigerator in the middle of the night. All this is making my mother depressed. We have frequently told Dad he will need to go to a "home" or "assisted living" if he keeps up this behavior. He's getting really bad now. My question....do you put an 87 yr old through de-tox?? Do you just move him to a facility and let Mom have some peace? She's been co-dependent for years, but lately she's asked for help. What to do? What to do?