Very Disturbing!

heydeborahJuly 8, 2005

the most weirdest thing i have seen on the news today was that they found a lady outside of a local restaurant around 6 pm 2 nights ago, she was about 60-70 years old, 5foot 8, and weighed about 100 pounds, she didn't talk and they figured (police) that she was of europeon heritage. they brought her to the hospital and then showed pictures of her and if anyone knew this woman to call police. it seems someone did recognize her and called in. but what disturbs me was that this woman was missing 24 hours before someone called in, and it was not a relative, no missing persons report was filed, and why wasn't she being watched. we live up the street from a place called the heritage where Alz. patients live and believe me they cannot get out. if she is being cared for at home why wasn't she being watched more carefully. the restuarant where she was doesn't have homes near it for afew miles and then you have to go across and expressway, bush or a golf course. i felt so sorry for this woman, you could tell that at one time she was very beautiful, i can live with Al's illness but when someone doesn't have control of their lives anymore (i figure she must have alz, but this is just me) how in the world could s he be left alone, you wouldn't leave an infant by themselves even to dash into a store for a second. do you think this is common or am i just too sensitive after reading all the posts here? enjoy your day, we're going to have a hot one about 98 today! deb

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mimi427

Oh Debbie,
It's SO sad isn't it? There are a lot of people out there that walk around with blinders on, unwilling to see the needs of others, especially their own parents...guess they are just too self absorbed. Believe me, I feel the same way as you do...just breaks my heart...
I guess I'm a little down today anyway...mom's been doing ok lately, kind of holding her own, so to speak. Last nite though, after dinner, we were sitting and watching TV and suddenly she said "OK, it's time for me to go home now"...I just looked at her, rather stunned, not knowing where that came from...she's been living here 8 months now. So I said "mom, you are home" she said "I am?" and stupidly I asked if she was joking...I guess I just couldn't believe what was coming out of her mouth. After a little conversation, she told me she felt as if she was just visiting, so I assured her that this is her home and that was that...it was just so, so strange and it really did bring me down. You know, I've read and read and read everything I can get my hands on about Alzheimer's, talked to her doctor, the social worker, people on this site and another one and you think you are prepared, but I guess you can never really be prepared for the strangeness of this disease...and I do know it's only going to get worse...
Try to keep cool today Deb...in Chicago we're having picture perfect weather...in the70's and not a cloud in the sky...be well, Mimi

    Bookmark   July 8, 2005 at 12:14PM
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derryw

That is sad, Deb. I wonder if she has a family....or if she lives alone and the change came on acutely. Doesn't seem easy to lose an adult, to me. Wonder if she was driving and got lost.
You are right, Mimi. Nothing really prepares you for it, although intellectually knowing what may come is helpful. Then it hits you in the face. I remember how upset I was when my mother first would awaken a little "mixed up" and call me "Mama". And she was still functioning. I remember just crying..... You just have to do the best you can. No one says not to get upset :(. Shalom..Derry

    Bookmark   July 8, 2005 at 3:27PM
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PeaBee4

Deborah, dumping aged relatives someplace is not all that unusual. We occasionally had people dumped off at the ER parking lot. We have to face it, some people just don't want to be bothered with either children or the elderly. And some are so ignorant that they aren't aware of financial aid available and feel they can no longer care for the relative. But you are right! It is very disturbing. Human nature at it's worse.

    Bookmark   July 8, 2005 at 4:56PM
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lasershow

Wow, I just can't believe this. I mean, I don't doubt the story but I can't believe people are so uncaring. NO ONE missed this poor woman for over 24 hours?

I hear stories about elder abuse and I'm just horrified...especially when you know that the majority of cases go unreported because the poor elder is in fear.

    Bookmark   July 9, 2005 at 9:43PM
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heydeborah

the lady is still in the hospital for observation, which is good i guess. i think that people seem to take better care of their pets that older persons! there was nothing in the newspaper about this sad story and knowing the news media here that will be the end of the story. i did watch a documentary on our tvo (your pbs), where children will actually buy used clothing for their relative, take out all the labels, and drive for a few hundred miles and leave the elder on a park bench or at a park. and they will drive home thinking they did the right thing. i do know that i have alot on my plate with Al, but this is so disturbing because she wasn't missing from a hospital, seniors home or group home. i know for me i check on Al about every 30-45 minutes, so why wasn't she checked on? well it's my furry friends time to go out (see i even go out into the back yard with him), enjoy your day, we have a blues fest here on the water front and the sound travels up to our house (i feel like i'm there without the charge of tickets), it's going to be a hot one here again - 97, and maybe i'll be able to get some reading in - PeaBee started a Joanna Carl book, started off pretty good so far. debbie

    Bookmark   July 10, 2005 at 11:45AM
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PeaBee4

And then, there is also the chance that since we have people that are waaayyy below average intellegence taking care of relatives, it's possible that they didn't realize that she wasn't where she should be. Sometimes you see Alzheimers in both the husband and wife. Together they can exist, apart, they can't function.
I've started Joan Hess Closely Akin To Murder I'll let you know.

    Bookmark   July 10, 2005 at 3:07PM
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