abreezeMay 4, 2005

Hi Kathy... Just wondering how you are doing with your back... Also, how is your mother doing since her fall? Poor thing sounded like she was hurting pretty bad... May God comfort, strengthen, and minister healing to you and your loved ones. ~abreeze

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My back is still killing me !!!!! But I just keep on truckin...Dont have anytime to go see the Dr who is 70 miles away. But I am wearing a patch that does help the pain.
My Mom is doing better still getting PT at home 2 times a week .
ANd also she is now going to day care for 2 days a week,
She went to day care last Tues for the first time...They come the 21 miles to pick her up in the AM and bring her home around 3 in the afternoon.
She says its not bad but she would rather be at home in her own chair,
I told her that she has to go both days as it gives me time to go to the store or Drs...
Tomorrow is her second day to go and they take them all out on an outing of somekind. So I am hoping that she will enjoy that.
She says the people are all nice and the place is clean and if she had to go to a N/H that is where she would go.
I know this is something that she really doesnt want to do(daycare)but I really need the time for myself right now.
Do you all think its right to make her go????
I may cut it back to just one day a week but I hope she will gp both days....
Keeping you all in my good thoughts and hope all is well with you all hugs Kathy
ANd thanks for thinking of me abreeze

    Bookmark   May 5, 2005 at 9:54AM
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derryw is definitely a good thing, as long as she is healthy enough to go. It will give you a break and her some social interaction. My mother liked it once I got her there, and she had something to talk about that was newsy and she could drive the conversation. Altogether good. I do hope you can get some more help with the back. How about PT for you!? Shalom...Derry

    Bookmark   May 5, 2005 at 10:58AM
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Dear Kathy... How wonderful that day care has opened up for your mother, and they are driving her! :) I agree with Derry. It's not wrong for you to make her go as long as it's not harming her. It sounds like her first day went well. Don't be hasty to cut back to one day - give her time to get comfortable there and make some acquaintances. She knows how much you love her and how faithfully you've taken care of her all of these years... You're in need of some special time and care now, and this is how she can help you.

You've pushed yourself hard for such a long time. You do need some help for your back. Is there any way you can get it??? ~breezy

    Bookmark   May 5, 2005 at 11:08AM
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Kathy: I wish my Mom had wanted to go: she evidently was more adamant than your Mom...;-)
You'll cherish those breaks later, even more than you do now, as her condition deteriorates (hopefully that won't happen, but just in case). I was with Mom 24/7 and just wished for a few hours along in the house! The only times that happened in the past 11 years was when she went to get her perms! She's in a NH now, and it's quite a change.
But for you...continue to encourage her...the worst thing they can do is get so comfortable in "their chair" that they rarely leave it! She'll look forward to the companionship and new adventures there.....I hope you stick to two days a week: you'd have less risk of burn-out..


    Bookmark   May 5, 2005 at 12:17PM
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Dear Kathy,
I think it's wonderful that your mom is going to day care, but I have to ask you, how did you get her to go, since it sounds she was reluctant...I BEGGED and PLEADED with my mom and she flat out refused. I got her to at least go, just to see it and I stayed with her...she sat there like a pouty little kid with her arms crossed in front of her, barely speaking to anyone, even though everyone tried very hard to include her. We stayed a few hours and she insisted on leaving. I got her to go back the next day, again with me staying, but that time she only stayed an hour and said she'd never go back, and she hasn't - that was six months ago and she's been in her ***???!!! chair ever since then : ) People say I shouldn't push, if she's happy in her chair, so be it. I do have a caretaker here during the day, so I can get away, then again, I work full time, so it's not exactly "my time". In any case, I'm curious how you did it...then again, maybe your mom just wasn't as opposed (or stubborn) as mine...are you dealing with Alzheimer's? My mom is 83 and was diagnosed with it about two year's ago. On another note, I understand the pain you are dealing with, with your back. I've had chronic back problems for years and years and it's no fun, but after a while, you do just get use to managing it...good luck with both, Mimi

    Bookmark   May 5, 2005 at 10:38PM
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Hello Kathy, I will add my 2 cents....agree that you should keep the 2 days for your Mom. Lady you need that time for you....your dear Mom knows how much you love her and have given so much. There are just times that we have to think of is not selfish...we need a balance if at all possible. Take care of you!!!! God Bless, Nora

    Bookmark   May 6, 2005 at 8:06AM
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Kathy, so good to hear from you. I am out of town most of the week, but have thought of you and your Dear Mother. I never could get my MIL to go ,she would say, ohhh maybe when it gets warm, then would find another excuse. Ohhh but she loved to talk to the nurses when she went in the hospital. I think alot of it, was she got "comfotable in her home with her bathroom, and she always worried how she would be able to use the rest room somewhere else. poor thing is passed on now, but for 5 years, she was just comfy in my dowstairs. I think it is a must to get time alone and also good for her. ....give her a chance to accustom to it, if she contines to bark about it, cut it down to one day. Wouldn't you just love one of those back aparatus you see on T.V. the one where you lay on it and fall backwards. looks as if that would stretch the spine and feel sooooo good. Take care kathy....and take care of your back.....lots of Hugs....Gabby

    Bookmark   May 6, 2005 at 2:46PM
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