Mom goes into LTC tomorrow

Glitter53April 7, 2005

What a whirlwind it's been! It's all happened so fast and I'm bursting into tears every few minutes, and I'm about thisclose to cancelling the whole thing!!

I didn't know it would be this hard......

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My thoughts and prayers are with you...Mimi

    Bookmark   April 7, 2005 at 6:39PM
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Wish I could share a hug with you. But we're thinking of you and your Mother, and I know you are doingt he best things for her.


    Bookmark   April 7, 2005 at 6:48PM
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Linda, things WILL be hard for probably a long time. but knowing the way you love your mom, it's the best thing that you can do for her right now, easier for me to say, i'm the one who wouldn't put al in ltc just down the street from us! but maybe you're getting some kind of sign that things went so fast, sometimes it's the best way! Hugs to you, and take care!!!! debbie

    Bookmark   April 7, 2005 at 7:03PM
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May God minister peace to you and your precious mother and bless her with wonderful care... ~abreeze

    Bookmark   April 7, 2005 at 9:28PM
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Wow, that sure moved fast. It is the right thing to do, Linda. I know you feel guilt, and you feel like you're abandoning your mom (Been There, Done That), but deep down inside I'm sure you know that she needs the kind of care you can't provide. It is what it is and it's nobody's fault. You did the very best you could, but this is something you can't control. Sometimes life just sucks.

Breathe...take it one step at a time...and know that you will go through these emotions until you are reassured that she's in the right place. Give yourself time to unwind and adjust. The decline has been very rapid, and before you even had time to get used to the fact that she might be placed within a few months, here she is being placed within a few days. So it's a lot of changes in a short amount of time.


    Bookmark   April 7, 2005 at 10:35PM
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It is hard, I know, but I knew my dad was getting more attention than I could give him in his condition. He actually settled in better than I thought he would.
Hugs to you and your mom.

    Bookmark   April 7, 2005 at 10:37PM
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Linda, please let us know how things progress. We all learn so much from one thoughts are with you...I hope so much it all goes well for you and your Mother. It will be difficult I'm sure, but this may be the best and most loving thing you can do...

    Bookmark   April 7, 2005 at 11:13PM
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There is no way that you can make it easier. Just take it as it comes. Now, for a few days, she may be more confused. Don't be tempted to take her back with you. This will pass and she soon won't remember any place but the LTC home. You will want to take her for a ride or something soon, but don't do it for a couple of weeks. It will just slow down her adjustment to new surroundings.
Take care of yourself!

    Bookmark   April 8, 2005 at 9:56AM
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Linda, my heart goes out to you and your mom at such a difficult, heartbreaking time. Not a one of us wants or wanted to make that kind of decision and I still have difficulty with it even though it's been 6 months now since I had to place my dad.

One thing that I am seeing now that might help you a bit, is that my dad is getting the care I could not give him and I know that if anything happens there's round the clock help. I'm also seeing that my dad is being around more people and he's not allowed to "hole up" in isolation like he was used to living. Several aides and nurses just adore him and he likes the attention. He didn't like mine.

You are in my thoughts and prayers and just know there's more of us that are going through this and we all understand. You're not alone. Please be good to yourself and get some much needed rest when things settle down a bit.


    Bookmark   April 8, 2005 at 10:46AM
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Dear Linda...I cannot imagine how hard this must be for you. You just have to take it slow and get thru each day (or part) at a time. I agree with PB and the others...she can do very well in LTC and you two can still be ever so close. (((To You))). Derry

    Bookmark   April 8, 2005 at 2:05PM
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It's very difficult. The hardest part for my father when my mother went into LTC, was the realization that she was much happier there than at home. She knew the limits of her world and felt safe.

Good luck, she'll do fine, and so will you.

    Bookmark   April 8, 2005 at 3:21PM
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Linda, Wow! Guess this is the big day for you & your Mother. It will work out best for's just hard to know that at first. Sometimes acceptance is the most difficult part of a transition.

Will keep you in my prayers tonite & God Bless you & your Dear Mother.

Sincerely, Sharlee

    Bookmark   April 8, 2005 at 9:27PM
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