Elderly Mom's home

mlou_51April 13, 2011

My mother's now almost 82 and wondering about her home. My sister stays with her and wants Mom to put the house in her name. She says she was told if Mom passed away that the goverment would take a large chunk of it even if she has a will leaving it to be sold and divided among the 4 of us children. She was told this at nursing classes. She also wants Mom to take 40,000 out of the bank and put it her safe. Same reason. Is this true? And I'm concerned about what happens if my sister for some reason dies before our Mom. Mlou

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Mlou, this is something for an attorney to handle. It is too important to figure out on your own. Adding adult children to a home title can create problems. Just one example is if your sister was ever sued, the home could be lost. That is something you would not want to happen to your mom.

You should not make such important decisions based on what someone else tells you. Only an attorney has the ability to combine knowledge of current law with your mother's unique situation. I know that consulting with an attorney costs money, but it is money well spent and can save your mom not only money but a lot of heartache in the future.

    Bookmark   April 13, 2011 at 6:25PM
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Check with the attorney about a living trust, I think that is what is called. I agree, only the attorney can answer these questions. One child should not be in control so much.He/she can also check to make sure all her medical stuff is in order.

    Bookmark   April 13, 2011 at 7:36PM
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And unless your mother is a very wealthy woman, if she has to go onto Medicaid in the next five years after transferring assets, she'll find that the state will still come after the money.

    Bookmark   April 13, 2011 at 7:59PM
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Connie Kru

Is you sister being paid to look after your Mom.
Is this your sister way of being sure that she is compensated for the care she is giving??

    Bookmark   April 15, 2011 at 1:33PM
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Taking money from the bank is a bad idea. I wouldn't like the idea of the house being put in one child's name at this time either. Mother could easily live for 10 or 15 more years. That money could earn a lot of interest in that length of time.

    Bookmark   April 15, 2011 at 2:53PM
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"She says she was told...."

Oh, I love this! I've heard so much of it.

The elderly sister told what by whom? The imagination staggers. I've seen this so many times. Please assess the situation diligently and immediately with the intention of intervening. Clear to me from your post that neither sister knows anything about their situation.

This is IMPORTANT stuff!!!!! Please, please seek out, obtain, and pay for competent advice!!!

    Bookmark   April 15, 2011 at 8:10PM
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What bothers me the most about this is the fact that the daughter is probably in her 50s. Right? So, the possibility of her getting health problems, stoke, heart attact, etc. is very real. What then? If the house is in the daughter's name, it can be attached to pay HER bills and then, the mother has nothing. The 40,000 would go quickly too.

Mother could easily outlive daughter. It happens all the time.

    Bookmark   April 18, 2011 at 9:17PM
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Your mother needs to consult an attorney who specializes in estate planning. Don't ever try to do these things on your own. It is worth the money to get it right.

    Bookmark   June 20, 2011 at 12:59AM
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I know of one case in Arkansas where the mother died and the house was left to both daughters. One daughter was living with their Mom and caring for her. She did not have to move out of the house even though both daughters owned it. She stayed there letting the house deteriorate and nothing her sister could about it.

    Bookmark   July 2, 2011 at 6:10PM
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