Update - my mother is now in nursing home -long
I had a previous post "my mother had a stroke - what are the choices for care" and thought I would post an update. She had fallen a few more times at home and I had said next time she falls call an ambulance. And she ended up in a hospital for a few days, then went to one of the better nursing homes in the area. Mentally she has good and bad days, the physical therapy isn't as intensive as the re-hab center but I don't think she can really get back on her feet. She was struggling with a walker before the stroke, but mentally she was sharp.
I now have power of attorney and it was emotional, writing that 1st check for her. And seeing her last entry in checkbook the day before she had the stroke was emotional also.
I know she never wanted to be in a nursing home but at least I know she is being well cared for 24/7 and it is a good place. She recently went to the hospital for evaluation and the CT scan was ok, and they changed her meds some. The Dr. phoned today at 6:15 am and I thought the worst, but it was just to tell me she was being discharged, and to answer questions. (that was another thing I didn't expect, her regular GP doesn't see her anymore) Basically she has some heart weakness now and the confusion is from scar tissue in the brain. I asked that she be walked more with her walker, which I wasn't sure was happening.
Assisted living is out because she has gone downhill some, can't check her own blood sugar etc.
I guess I am looking for ideas to make her life comfortable and happy. I am wondering what others did in this situation. I mean, honestly, this may sound silly, I'd like to get some nice comfortable clothes that are easy to put on and remove. She will need help with that, but ease of use would make life more pleasant.
I will have to arrange a phone and TV, now that she is in 'regular' part of home.
Dealing with the finances has been difficult, she could have been more open with me about things. I have to take care of this, on top of my own grief about the situation. But I am soldiering forward, and have come to accept that she has been really damaged by the stroke, and her life cannot go back to being close to what it was. I'm not happy about it, but I have come to accept it as an unhappy, cold, hard fact. Luckily, my husband has been very supportive, although he gets frustrated that there is something to deal with daily. I am trying to distract myself with some gardening projects, that and the nice weather has helped - but just a little.
Thanks for letting me vent.