A family dispute about elder's legal affairs
Anyone have experience w/legal wrangling over elder's affairs?
My FIL established trusts, health car proxies, etc w/ the help of my SIL (his middle daughter) several years ago, and now the other SIL (his oldest child, we'll call her SIL#2) is filing legal papers to get guardianship of MIL (suffers from dementia in assisted living place near SIL#2 ), essentially taking it away from FIL. In another filing, she is seeking conservatorship of FIL. This will give her sole authority over his assets, but not personal affairs, whatever that means.
He has agreed to this and has asked SIL not to fight this, that he just wants to "die in peace". He is 85 yrs old, and NOT in bad health. Lives in the independent living wing of the same facility as MIL.
SIL#2 is notoriously bad at handling her own financial affairs and we feel that she is making a mad grab for the money, which is substantial. Yet, she is a frequent visitor (we live 800 miles away) and helps to feed MIL. OTOH, in order to request guardianship, she took MIL to 4 doctors to have her claimed incompetent, which was humiliating and painful for FIL to witness. We believe that SIL#2 has been mainipulating and verbally abusing FIL to agree to her plans.
Now we are faced with the prospect of hiring lawyers to fight this and protect Dad's original plans (and his assets for their nursing home care). Court date later in April. We'll likely be stuck with these legal costs.
This is such a sad way to spend one's final years. Any advice from those who have been there, done that?