I need help with something please.
Hello everyone, hmmm... should I start from the beginning or to the present moment. I will do a quick run through and elaborate on the present...
2005- A elderly man moves in next door. Has a new but tiny one bedroom mobile home. He is nice and befriends my little boy.
2006- We become really good friends, his daughter comes by and visits him and I admire their relationship. Continue being a good neighbor and friend. My son loves being around him and learning things from this man. I start driving him to his doctor's appointments, and helping him with things he needs to have done.
2007- Neighbor starts inviting me and my son for dinner once a week and sharing more about his life, etc...I start noticing he is very very lonely and that he is having more health issues. Daughter never helps with his health issues so I stepped up and started helping more and more.
2008- He gets a computer so my son can play games when he comes over. And then he asks me to help him more and more.He had a huge open sore on his leg. I asked him if he had it looked at. He said he is taking care of it...
2009- My father passed away he bought me and my son a plane ticket to go to my fathers funeral in florida. I paid him back in full when I got back. Was in florida a month. When I got back I noticed he had another large sore on his leg. I moved in with him to help him. Yes, his daughter visited but she never helped him. He couldn't walk or stand long so I did most of the cooking and cleaning for him.
2009(end)-2010-I personally called his doctor regarding the sores on his legs and the doctor said he had no idea what I was talking about. I arranged for him to get to a critical care wound center and have been living with him ever since, being a caregiver. I still have my home next door but he needed constant care, more and more and more.His wounds healed after skin grafts and I took him to his doctor visits which was around 3 a week for the whole year. Vascular Venous surgery too lots of healing needed to be done. Problem was making him rest he would not rest.
2011- I am still here. January...he decided he was going to put his car and little mobile home in my name, in case something happened to him, and give me POA to continue paying his bills for him. Well, on the day I took him to his doctor visit he was really so weak. I was alarmed and I notified his doctor when I took him inside. The doctor said she would check on my concerns and I could go do my errands he should be done in an couple of hours. I went to buy a large shower transfer stool, I was so afraid he would fall in there and thought it might help with getting him in and out of the shower easier. When I got back the receptionist said the doctor had called an ambulance and he needed to go to the hospital.
I ran back to him and he looked so different his skin had become yellowish and he seemed so weak.Well we got him to the hospital emergency room, and I asked him if I should call his daughter. He freaked out, and started screaming no, no, no. The nurse said don't say what ever you said again please. Well he was admitted to MICU, and I discussed with them about calling his daughter and they asked him again. He almost had a heart attack screaming nooo. This went on for 3 days and he did not allow us to contact his daughter. Now note this reaction was duly noted by the doctors and staff on his records. Ok, my problem is after he finally calmed down and was reassured that his advance directive had me and another of his friends on it he finally allowed us to call his daughter...
She ignored me and has called social services saying that I am doing elderly financial abuse. I was contacted by them and they also talked to him. He told them that I have control and his daughter is not to touch any of his money, or have decision making regarding his treatment. You ask why he reacted this way? His daughter told him before,that all old people should just die, and he never wanted her in control over his life decisions. Now she is hiring a lawyer, what should I do? I know, I am not doing anything wrong, I just fear the costs of this type of ordeal. I just get the things he asks me to get,I pay his bills, etc...Honestly this man does not have alot of money, he has given her most of his money already, the money he has left will most likely go into his long term care. But she feels she is entitled to his money now. It's his money, and even though he gave me his car and little home I would sell it (cause really its his), if he ran out of money so he could have continued care...I think he was worried she would take everything from him and pull the plug on him.