Commemorating a life and giving back to a nursing home

debbiepeeverJanuary 2, 2007

My brother's god father of whom I as well as our family was very close to just died at the age of 94. My brother and I called him "uncle" throughout his lifetime. He was in a very dignified nursing home for the past two years of which the care was incredulous.

I visited him weekly and it was very hard for me to see him deteriorate at a fast rate within the last month - but no matter when I or anyone I now find out - would visit, he would always have a smile on his face and utter out a joke he had heard. He was the most unselfish of people, and raised a son of which survived the World Trade Centre Tragedy and saved another life while fighting for his own in the trade centre.

My family would like to do something special to commemorate his life - and we felt that since the care was so good that we would like to do something through the nursing home.

My uncle's name was Harold William Lewis Clark, of which he said the acronyms of his name meant Handle With Loving Care. I was hoping to add this into the comendation but have already given the head nurse a plaque of which I embedded a poem regarding a caregiver and her love.

I guess I am asking two questions - as I just had a thought about planting a tree in their courtyard with a plaque "handle with loving care". Would this be enough to commemorate his life and give back to the nursing home - as a plaque like that would leave a person with a nice thought.

Please let me know what everyone thinks. Or if you have other ideas!!!

Thank you!


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What a lovely tribute! I understand how you feel.

A tree would be lovely, if the nursing home wants it. What about a bench? That's awfully useful. You might sit down with the administrator or the social worker and ask what they could use, and see what fits into your budget.

But if you really want to give back to the nursing home, think about becoming a Friendly Visitor or a volunteer at the nursing home. Your uncle had you to come visit, but many people have no one, or at least no one who comes to visit very often. You might also find a Senior Center near you that would like a volunteer to help with activities.

After my mother died at age 95 a year ago, I signed up at our local Alliance on Aging to be a peer counselor, and I visit someone every week, and have been trained to listen and to offer what help I can to seniors dealing with depression or loneliness and other issues. There are so many other people who need your care, and I think your Uncle would like to know that you continue his legacy and treat others With Tender Loving Care.

Hugs to you and your family on the loss of your beloved Uncle. There is obviously a lot of love in your family!

    Bookmark   January 2, 2007 at 6:24PM
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A tree would be lovely. What about a contribution to a scholarship fund for nursing students? Especially those specializing in geriatrics. Being a volunteer is also wonderful if you are in a position to have that extra time. I wish I had known him. How lucky you were!

    Bookmark   January 6, 2007 at 6:37PM
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Handle With Loving Care! How lovely!
Most nursing homes have a "scholarship" fund to provide for those who cannot pay. I would suggest a contribution to that fund might allow others to be "Handled With Loving Care" when they might not other wise be able.
My condolences on your loss.
Linda C

    Bookmark   January 7, 2007 at 12:11AM
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