Hair Woes

cupajoeAugust 28, 2004

I've been married for 17 years to a man who's sister does hair.Ever since getting married,his family has insisted that she be the only person to do my hair.I used to cut my own bangs,and finally became sick of listening to his family harp about how bad my hair looked,so I gave in.BTW,it was never bad when I cut it.I've had 17 years of her doing what ever she wants to my hair,despite my suggestions.Of course everyone in his family thinks she does great work on my hair.For me it's been years of layered perms (I hate layers) or cutting the back into a point instead of straight across (my hair is waist long),or trimming a foot off my hair everytime I need it trimmed.A few years ago when the white hairs started growing in,she tried to dye them.The dye rinsed out,and she ended up foiling and highlighting my hair with lots of light brown ,and gold strands.Because of the way it was foiled,this lasted about six months before the new growth needed redoing.I loved it.Next time I went back(told her how much I loved it) she painted a brown shade on my white hairs,and it washed out.For the last five years she hasn't put any color on that stayed on.She hasn't foiled me since then.I would like to take the plunge and dye my own hair.I used to color it once in a while before I married.Right now my hair is permed.Anyone on this forum who can advise me?I don't want to ruin my hair,but I have a hard time believing that all dye rinses out.Sandy

Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

When I did my own color I liked Clairol Professional, Beautiful Collection (from a beauty supply store). It is semi-permanent hair dye with no peroxide bleach or ammonia, and it helped cover and blend in my gray hairs (something like Loving Care, but it doesn't dull my hair).

It is not expensive, requires no mixing, comes in its own squeeze bottle and you can keep the leftovers until next time. I have fine, fragile hair and it left it in good condition.

I normally shampoo my hair every other day and the color from each application lasted about 5 weeks for me. It is easy to put on, requires no heat and doesn't smell bad. You just wash and towel dry your hair, apply the liquid and wait about 35-45 minutes before you rinse it out. I used to clip a plastic bag around my head to keep from dripping. Disposable plastic gloves come in handy when using any hair dye, so you don't stain your fingers and nails.

My hair was not permed when I colored it, so that might make a difference for you. You should experiment on an inconspicuous lock of your hair first, before you do your whole head.

P.S. Nowadays I get blonde highlights done at a salon (which blend in the gray so it's less noticeable) along with brown lowlights. I like how it looks, but it is expensive to keep up.

    Bookmark   August 28, 2004 at 11:11PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

Gray is very hard to color. It is particularly resistant to coloring. Home color, as far as I know, will fade from gray hair. I would find a good salon and a color expert. I don't know what kind of excuse you should give your family! Maybe tell them you no longer want to impose! It's the best I can think of so early!


    Bookmark   August 29, 2004 at 8:57AM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

If it were me, I'd just go to a salon. But that's me! I'm paranoid about my hair as far as cutting/dying it myself (which I've never tried) because I know something catastrophic would happen. Does the SIL really know what she is doing? (Maybe that was your point, sorry) I think if my family was insisting where I got my hair done and how I"d go batty.

    Bookmark   September 2, 2004 at 10:15PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

Hi Sandy,

I'm assuming the reason you want to color your hair is to cover gray???

It is not true that all over the counter color won't cover gray hair. However, some gray hair is very resistant and hairdressers have options you wouldn't for covering it. Permanant color is not all created equal some cover better than others. Peroxide volumes and color combinations can be altered to cover the gray, as well as pre-softening the gray if necessary.

You didn't say if your SIL was using permanant color. If you used permanant color your ends will fade, but they should not turn gray. It makes me suspicious she used a semi or temp color when she applied the brown.

If the gray is bothering you, my suggesting is to get a foil weave like your SIL did before, and then have your roots re-weaved.

There are many ways to deal with gray hair. When we get lots of gray and the natural color isn't working well with highlights any longer it is common to add a color with the blonde like Petaloid is doing (a brown or blonde shade with another blonde shade). A haircolorist will weave and color the grow out at the same time using foils with two colors when desired. They will also refresh faded ends (any color will fade) as necessary with a demi or semi color that has lower peroxide so the least amount of damage is done to the hair.

With long hair make sure the person is highly skilled and expect to pay big bucks. It is difficult to work with waist length hair especially if it is thick, and it requires more product.

If you had short-med length hair, and got regular haircuts I'd say try the home products, but since you have waist length hair I would not do your own hair. Even if you are succesful the first time you will have a heck of a time touching up your roots with that length hair, as well as refreshing the color on the ends.

Long hair has special needs and concerns. That's my two cents worth! good luck.

    Bookmark   September 2, 2004 at 11:41PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

Thanks for the advice.I am still pondering my possibilities.SIL is very capable of doing the weave foil thing as she has done it sucsessfully on me before.For some reason she won't do it again.My hair is very fine.It's not super thick,but because of the lengh it is going to be a problem.The gray is not an issue on the bottom third of mt hair.The permanent dye is washing out right away from the top portion.What do you think of henna as a solution?I've heard that there is less risk of damage.Sandy

    Bookmark   September 3, 2004 at 9:39PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

Henna is not for use on gray, I would not use it.

Sandy, Permanent color should be covering your gray if a hairdresser is doing it. There are several ways to approach resistant hair, and one of them will work. If you are not getting the results you are looking for I would ask another colorist. Meet with them for an evaluation, which should be free and discuss your color and their approach to it.

If your hair is brown another option is to have the dark color weaved into the top portion of your hair to help blend the top and bottom, as well as cover a portion of the gray.

    Bookmark   September 4, 2004 at 1:20AM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

Ponderinstuff,Thanks for the advice.Sounds like you really know your stuff.Now that you've described the process,I can see that she has done the permant color weaving thing on my hair.Trouble is,it is rinsing out.I'll bet the problem is that instead of filing a card on which products she has tried to use,she relies on her memory because I'm a relative,and may just be using the same stuff over and over that rinses out.Thanks again for your help.Sandy

    Bookmark   September 5, 2004 at 11:38AM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

Your welcome Sandy, good luck.

    Bookmark   September 6, 2004 at 12:19AM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

Color Spa by l'Oreal is great for hair that's less than 40% grey. It turns the greys/whites into highlights.

I would choose a color that's MUCH LIGHTER than your natural. Also, even semi-perm colors become permanent over time, so, try to use it only on the roots when touching up.

The first time you use it, follow the directions. Thereafter, use it full-force only on the roots. Then, dilute it with 1/3 shampoo and run the rest through the rest of your hair for the last 5 minutes to brighten the rest of the hair.

I swear by this stuff. I have very dark hair (almost black) with a lot of white hairs at my temples and a streak (call me Pepe le Pew) along my part. I use a mid-light brown. I started with the darkest color, that was way too dark. I've worked my way down to this light color.

Also, you have to decide between ash or red. The auburns tend to turn too red for my taste. I use an ash/neutral color.

I would go to their website to make sure it's appropriate for your needs.

    Bookmark   September 6, 2004 at 4:10PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

I am not certain, but the Loreal product appears to be a color that coats the hair (last x amount of shampoos). That tells me it coats and washes out.

Beware, that if you have porous ends on long hair even a temporary (coating only) haircolor may still stain porous hair/ends permanently.

    Bookmark   September 8, 2004 at 10:20PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

I have a client who has the same hair dilemna and a great and inexpensive colorist.I've decided to let an expert do the job.Thanks for the advice everyone.You've been great,Sandy

    Bookmark   September 10, 2004 at 12:16AM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

you've gotten perms, and your hair still grows past your shoulder?

I'm impressed... it may be fine, but it's stronger than it looks, in that case.

if your SIL isn't willing to treat you like a paying client instead of a practice mannequin...and it's pretty obvious she's playing with your hair, not servicing you as a customer...

you have already made the right decision :)

I'm SO lucky I don't have to worry about these things- I tint my silvers a rather vibrant blue, and my husband touches the color up every 3 weeks or so :)

    Bookmark   September 10, 2004 at 1:10PM
Thank you for reporting this comment. Undo

Yes ,I perm and have waist long hair.I never ever blow dry it.I comb it carefully with a very wide tooth comb,and wait till it is dry or nearly dry before combing.I also only wash it every other day,and always condition.Sandy

    Bookmark   September 15, 2004 at 11:58PM
Sign Up to comment
More Discussions
What to Wear with Dresses in the Winter
I notice the women on the morning shows all wear short...
Lifestyle lift, yeah or nay?
I am concerned with sagging and turkey neck. LL looks...
You are over 60 with fine, thin, straight hair
that won't take a perm. How do you wear your hair?
buying named fragrances on-line ... risky?
I find fragrances I like are not popular sometimes...
Can a fiftyish woman have oily skin?
What exactly is oily skin? I have an oily T zone, doesn't...
Sponsored Products
Dark Brown Leather Hide Hair Matador Pillow 18-inch
New Oriental Hand Knotted Wool Area Rug Runner Balouch Rose Red Veg Dyed Free Pa
BH Sun Inc
Give Me a Boost Decorative Outdoor Fountain
Lamps Plus
Walnut Brown Kari Vanity Set
Cost Plus World Market
Black 'Embrace Messy Hair' Print
$22.99 | zulily
Swanstone Bathroom Contour 31 in. Solid Surface Vanity Top in Tahiti Desert
Home Depot
Uncle Sam Figure
Grandin Road
Ryder Leather Sofa - Brighton Polinesia Blue
Joybird Furniture
People viewed this after searching for:
© 2015 Houzz Inc. Houzz® The new way to design your home™