Mizzou where are you?

MargerieMay 5, 2005

Don't tell me you are at Disney. Maybe I can rouse you from your nap with a little joke. Heard it before, but still makes me laugh.

The FBI had an opening for an assassin. After all

> the background checks, interviews, and testing were done

> there were 3 finalists. Two men and a woman.

>

>>

> For the final test, the FBI agents took one of the

> men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.

>

> "We must know that you will follow your instructions

> no matter what the circumstances. Inside the room you will

> find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill Her!"

>

> The man said, "You can't be serious, I could never

> shoot my wife."

>

> The agent said, "Then you're not the right man for this job. Take your

wife and go home."

>

> The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and

went into the room. All was quiet for about 5 minutes. The man came out

with tears in his eyes, "I tried, but I can't kill my wife."

>>

> The agent said, "You don't have what it takes. Take your wife and go

home."

>

> Finally, it was the woman's turn. She was given the same instructions,

to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were

heard, one after another.

> They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. After a few

minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the

woman. She wiped the sweat from her brow. "This gun is loaded with

blanks" she said. "I had to beat him to death with the chair."

>

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punamytsike

Was she a blondie?

    Bookmark   May 6, 2005 at 7:55AM
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allison0704

No, she was a red-head!

    Bookmark   May 6, 2005 at 7:56AM
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okwriter

Mizzou,

You better check in or I will "out" you.

:-)

    Bookmark   May 6, 2005 at 9:58AM
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rollie

I truly believe it was a redhead. heheheh

    Bookmark   May 6, 2005 at 10:18AM
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chisue

Hee, hee! Great story! Unfortunately, I suspect she is now head of the department.

    Bookmark   May 6, 2005 at 12:57PM
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Mizzou_KX

....... either that or she went to work for iVillage.

    Bookmark   May 6, 2005 at 1:58PM
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Chimeralife

Naw, she's in charge of the Entire United States and Canada.

Definately a brunette. We redheads are just so happy!

    Bookmark   May 7, 2005 at 8:30AM
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chisue

She's not just "department head", she's Bolton's department head.

    Bookmark   May 7, 2005 at 11:01AM
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sarahmakes6

What exactly did you mean by that, Rita? Suspicious minds are Chicken Hunting on the forum tonight and find that comment a little odd...

    Bookmark   May 8, 2005 at 1:06AM
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allison0704

Yea, who's "Bolton?"

    Bookmark   May 8, 2005 at 8:14AM
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demifloyd

President Bush's nominee for ambasssador to the United Nations.

    Bookmark   May 8, 2005 at 9:12AM
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allison0704

oh....I haven't been watching the news lately and we canceled our paper delivery. Too busy. Only Bolton I know of is Michael! lol

    Bookmark   May 8, 2005 at 9:37AM
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okwriter

saramakes6: When I said I'd "out" Mizzou, I meant I'd reveal why he way being so quiet. OK, he can clobber me later but he was in a funk about the missing chicken man.
Aren't we all?

    Bookmark   May 9, 2005 at 9:30AM
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allison0704

Can't chicken man just register as a new user with a new name? It wouldn't take long for us to figure out it was him. I was led to believe a few days ago he had registered again, but I won't name usernames. Haven't seen the new name post lately either.

    Bookmark   May 9, 2005 at 9:37AM
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Mizzou_KX

Yeah, okwriter. I glad you cleared THAT up. Boy, you don't post here for a day or so and stuff gets WAYYYYYYYY off track.

And "chicken man" hasn't been around. Maybe he's waitin' for the feathers to clear and then reappear as "Granite Guy" or "Cabinet Dude".

    Bookmark   May 9, 2005 at 9:53AM
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Brittta

Or "SIPs_Coffee" or "SIPs_Jack" or something "SIPping-ish"

Isn't he our resident SIP guy?

What is a SIP, anyway? I guess I should google that someday.

    Bookmark   May 9, 2005 at 11:09AM
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sarahmakes6

Alright, I guess I can let that comment go. I was thinking maybe Mizzou finally decided to jump ship (know he's hanging on the edge) and in a grand, elaborate scheme Jason was able to assume Mizzou's name. Wouldn't that have been interesting?

    Bookmark   May 9, 2005 at 12:15PM
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Mizzou_KX

Ha, that's the funniest thing I've heard in a long time. Jason as Me, too funny. Or Me as Jason, stranger yet. But I don't have any chickens.

We COULD start a new game. We would privately swap passwords with other members and log on and post under their names. That would be a hoot.

    Bookmark   May 9, 2005 at 1:51PM
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allison0704

That goes against rule #16, Mizzou!

"Users are expected to use a single identity in the forums. Using a nickname or pseudonym is fine, but it should be used consistently. Likewise, memberships and passwords cannot be shared between individuals."

Tell Goofy hello for us! ;0

    Bookmark   May 9, 2005 at 2:00PM
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Mizzou_KX

Oh rules .... smules. Can't we have any FUN at all?????

"...passwords cannot be shared between individuals." Welllllllllll.... what if we ALL had the SAME password. Doesn't say we can't HAVE the same password, just that we can't share them. I'll go get Sue the attorney and see if she can sort this out.

    Bookmark   May 9, 2005 at 2:29PM
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Chimeralife

Allison, there was someone here that reminded me of the chicken man, but then there was speculation to his identity, and now that person no longer even has a link to his name. I think it has something to do with a buckeye stating he was a spartan fan? Never heard of such a thing.

So we must continue to wait breathlessly for the return of our famous chicken man from exile. Where he is probably LHAO that we actually have taken this so to heart. But we do miss his sage words of wisdom.

I also think this is partly responsible for the post in another thread "...used to be a bunch of experienced people who posted on this forum but they just don't do it as much anymore..." or something like that. They are getting tired of being beat up by rightious newbies. There is absolutely no deferance for age and wisdom on this forum. hehehehe

chimera

Also wishing Jason would be released from Disney pergatory soon. Spike--can't you at least give us a timeline for parole?

    Bookmark   May 9, 2005 at 5:34PM
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greenbank

A joke (if you don't hear from me again, I'll be stuck in the log splash):

A state trooper pulls a car over for speeding. In the car is an old lady who is hard of hearing and her husband.

When the trooper asks the lady for her driver's license the lady responds, "Heh, what did he say?"

The old man speaks up as he says, "HE NEEDS YOUR DRIVER'S LICENSE."

A few minutes later the trooper comes back to the car and says, "Ma'am I see you're from Florida."

The old lady comments, "Heh, what did he say?"

The old man speaks up as he says, "HE SEES YOU'RE FROM FLORIDA.'" The old lady nods her head, "Yup."

The trooper mutters, "Boy, I had the worst sex I ever had in Florida."

The old lady replies, "Heh, what did he say?"

The old man yells, "HE SAYS HE THINKS HE KNOWS YOU!"

    Bookmark   May 9, 2005 at 6:22PM
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Mizzou_KX

Greenbank ------ You still here? Thought I heard a big splash.

    Bookmark   May 10, 2005 at 2:54PM
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greenbank

Haven't found Jason yet. He said he'd meet me at Space Mountain.

    Bookmark   May 10, 2005 at 4:08PM
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allison0704

I heard Jason was out with JG.

    Bookmark   September 13, 2005 at 10:33PM
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