yo house is a trash bin man.

diydanaOctober 10, 2004

I know of a condo around here. The house is a trash bin. There is stuff everywhere including bugs. My condo being attached makes me a bit worried that the bugs will find there way over. Actually we get some here and I spray jugs of killer around. I actually feel myself growing testicles and a 3rd leg as I write...help.

What would you do?

Can you call the clean police.

Is it 911?

OR 409?...I wish.

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There must be city health codes that are being violated. Have you looked into this?

    Bookmark   October 10, 2004 at 11:53PM
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Nope, did not want to be a stool pigeon.
This trashed out person is a kind wonderful person and a friend of mine.
A friend/neighbor.
However, the house has gotta go.
I do tell her that and she agrees.
Saying aint doin'...

    Bookmark   October 11, 2004 at 9:35AM
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if she's really a friend- why are you not over there helping?

if you're not willing to teach her how to take care of things (and since I know cancer patients, and people with CP who have found ways to keep house, I'm not buying 'she can't') and you're not willing to turn her in (to social services, the health department, or the condo police)

then you're no better than she is. at least she's not here talking trash about her neighors.

    Bookmark   October 13, 2004 at 4:18PM
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I have an aunt that has serious cleanliness issues. You'd never know it to look at her since she always looks well-kept, but the house where she and my uncle live is a cluttered, dirty nightmare. We've all tried to help her clean up, but she refuses to get rid of stuff. SHe's even gone out and retrieved trashbags from the street of things my uncle has tried to discard. I think it's a sickness and she needs more help than any of her friends or relatives can provide. I'm sure her neighbors gossip about her, and truly, I'd rather they do it on an anonymous forum asking for help than with people that might know her personally.

I'm not saying this is the case with your neighbor, but the dirtiness might be a result of depression or something else. Have you offered to help her clean? That wouldn't be a bad place to start, but don't be surprised if she turns you down. She might just need a push in the right direction to get started. Maybe the name of a cleaning service.


    Bookmark   October 15, 2004 at 10:25AM
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I suspect your friend/neighbor suffers from a hoarding ocd.
If so, as with the above poster's aunt, cleaning won't do much good. You'd be inside and she'd be outside bringing it all back in. I know someone who has am awesome view of the Pacific Ocean but can't see it for the clutter/mess in front of the windows. Can't find her bed (3 bedm) so sleeps in a recliner or motel. She buys things everywhere. Why? "It was a good buy." This woman is well off, educated and the neighborhood sweetheart.

If not an ocd with major hoarding involved it just may look hopeless to her. I'd hook her up with FlyLady.com, a local cleaning svc. or a schedule when I could help her. Maybe a combination of the three.

Her lifestyle many not be your choice, or few others, but it is her choice and most local authorities recognize this.

I think you are a good friend. Calling would be much easier.


    Bookmark   October 16, 2004 at 11:24AM
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China cat you suck. Your mean

    Bookmark   October 16, 2004 at 6:10PM
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Obsessive compulsive disorder is an illness. It can be treated with medication. The hard part is getting the person to realize and accept help. I know because I live with one such person. He has trashed his own home to the point where it is unliveable. In every other respect of his life, he is perfectly normal, holds down a good job, is a great guy, clean and well-dressed. But he cannot throw away used paper napkins, etc. He has every car he has ever owned, can't stand to get rid of them, ditto clothes and shoes, receipts to 1970, old tires. I don't let him pack rat at my house, and we have to have discussions about it sometimes. And the "it was such a good deal,I had to buy it" is a common excuse for the compulsive behavior.

OCD aside, This clutter thing is really on the rise, because only in the past two generations have we had access to buy so many things at cheap prices, so by now most people have serious stuff piling up. If you watch HGTV, you see shows about people tying to deal with this. We are blessed in America, maybe a bit too much.

    Bookmark   October 18, 2004 at 5:19PM
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Either take action (personally help... contact appropriate health services... call a relative... etc.) or quit complaining!

Not intending to be mean, but either you want a solution or you don't!

    Bookmark   October 19, 2004 at 11:15AM
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And it's not "your." It's "you're." The former is a contraction for the words "you are."

    Bookmark   October 21, 2004 at 8:16AM
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I'm mean?

:) good- the more people like you who find me offensieve, the less I have to interact with them.

I'll stick to my side of the tracks, where we're willing to be busybodies, instead of just gossips.

    Bookmark   October 25, 2004 at 10:17AM
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China cat, "your" still mean.
Shame on you.
ahh..thankx word police, Mjmercer
the world is a better place with your teacher like skills.

    Bookmark   November 2, 2004 at 10:14PM
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I posted this before but for some reason it did not show up. So here it goes again.
I have helped my neighbor before. I cleaned her kitchen and eat in. I removed 10 bags of trash from the kitchen/eat in. I scrubbed it down...took hours and de-bugged that area. She is not wanting more help yet. She recently cleaned up part of the garage and made a path to walk. I helped a little. It is very hard for her. The bugs are out of control. Her water heater, stove, dishwasher, toilet, central air, dryer, tub and sink are all broke. Her ceilings leak during rain.
I would clean for her every day for free if she would let me. It is just so hard for her to let go. I am gentle with her but firm too. I would do anything for her and she would do the same for me. I just want her to wake up a bit.
The bugs effect the other condo's and that is bad.
Hope the grammer police are not too mad.

    Bookmark   November 2, 2004 at 10:30PM
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If her condo is in such a poor state of repair I'm surprised that
a) the neighbours have not complained to the health authorities
b) the place hasn't been condemned.
Seriously, if all the fixtures are broken and the ceiling is leaking (where does your friend go to the toilet??) the place is a hazard to your friend's health and that of her neighbours. In my opinion you would be doing her a big favour to insist that she both gets treatment for her disorder and allows her home to be cleaned and repaired- and keep it that way.

    Bookmark   November 5, 2004 at 1:03AM
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diydana, you have tried to help. It is more caring if you call the health department, senior center or somebody, than if you clean for her. From what little you said here it really sounds like she needs a lot more than cleaning help.

    Bookmark   November 8, 2004 at 2:43PM
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I am sorry that I have made a few people in this forum mad.
Therefore, I have not been checking in too often.....
As to keep my mouth shut.
I am what I am...faults and all.
This lady with the problem house has two bathrooms, like my self. So she does not use the broken one.
She has gotten the water heater fixed and the man..a neighbor, who fixed the heater was speechless.
He is a long long time friend of the said lady.
She says the leaks in the ceiling are no big deal.. the buckets and pans hold the water that comes down.
She has plans of fixing it soon. BTW, the ceiling only leaks in the harsh windy rain storms. Or so she says.
I called the health dept. and gave no names but the dept. said, if a kid is not living with her under 5 yrs old... there is nothing they can do in Ohio.
She says her oven works some times. Her dishwasher is stuck on hot heating/ hold only if you do not jiggle the dial right. huh? Her kitchen table is broke and being held up by leaning on the window sill and has 2 good legs. There are a million excuses. There are carpet beetles and larva on nearly everything. Maggots in the eat-in...well I removed them for her and sprayed and bought her bug catching window traps. She has tiny little bugs that crawl all over the floors and eat the cat food. I wish I had a name for them. She has spiders all over. Tiny ones that make traps on the pots,books,cups and nic nacs galore.
She says they are all my friends...the bugs. She has a freaken eco system in that house.
The funny thing is her cat has no fleas. He eats mice and birds.I have not seen a squirrel, bunny or chipmunk alive here in a few years. He kills them as well. He bring her the left overs and she kicks them to the side of her porch. A real bone graveyard.
The whole thing is too much.
I have given up talking to her about it.
She took away a few car loads to Goodwill last week.
To a stranger who knows nothing about it... they would not believe she cleaned anything out- yet.
Forget about it eh?!
My surrender flag is up.

    Bookmark   November 8, 2004 at 10:02PM
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Your friend sounds mentally ill. does she have any family members that can come to see how she lives? Maybe they can get her the help she needs? Saying the maggots and bugs are her friends,tells me she is very ill. This is unhealthy for her & her neighbors.I'd be concerned with her state of mind. A fire in her home with so much clutter could go up in seconds.You would all be in danger then.Doesn't the association have someone to come in to Exterminate for bugs on a regular base? We do if he's not spraying outside he's inside.If we don't let them in we get a hefty fine.You should notify you association to the state of her unit.I'd hate to be her neighbor!

    Bookmark   November 10, 2004 at 1:07AM
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well she is a nature nut and goes exploring to far away countries. She lives a bit like a hippy, I guess. No offense to the hippy generation. She only needs a back pack and a little bit of money. She swaps things, barters and stuff like that. I suppose cleanliness is low on her list of life long wants and desires. She is older, double my age. Old habits die hard. Or so they say.
She does not believe in killing bugs. They help the environment, she loves them. However she seems to not mind what her( killing birds) cat does in nature.
I am worried about a fire...100%
The man who put in the water heater also cleaned out her furnace as a favor for the condo directly attached. The old man living there said to the fix it man I will pay you to clean her furnace but do not tell her so. The furnace filter was the original. Steel with the cord and cardboard still attached. The trash house lady denies it is original. It ( filter) is outside for 2 weeks now, leaning up against the condo.
I have never seen anything like it in my life. I should take a picture and post it. As for family, her parents are dead. Her sibling, she is estranged from.
Word is he lives like her too.
Sour grapes baby.

    Bookmark   November 10, 2004 at 11:03AM
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Dana, you have a big heart. But this lady, for the sake of her neighbors, needs the help of some sort of social services agency. It sounds like she lives the minimalist backpack & travel life to avoid her packrat home life.

As for her cat killing birds, she probably thinks of that as part of nature, too.

You are a good friend.

    Bookmark   November 10, 2004 at 11:27AM
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diydana if the Health Department in Ohio won't do anything then call Social Services, Department of Housing, the fire department or somebody.

You might consider her a friend but forget that for now. What are the risks she is causing to your family? If the neighbor hadn't paid the water heater guy to replace her original furnace filter, imagine the fire. What bugs are coming into your home and what diseases are they bringing with them.

If you are not going to do what it takes to get this obviously unstable lady help. Then at least call your insurance company and kick up your coverage. She might just start something cooking then wander off to watch the bugs and leave you homeless.

    Bookmark   November 10, 2004 at 5:57PM
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Gammy T,
Social services huh?
Will try.
Thank you.

    Bookmark   November 11, 2004 at 7:57PM
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This woman is either seriously mentally ill or she just doesn't mind living with vermin and filth. But her lifestyle choices are affecting YOUR property and the value of YOUR property.

You're a good friend to try and help her but this is way beyond what a friend can do. It's time to notify every social service agency, fire department, mental health board, elder agency, and everything else, that this woman appears to be unable to comprehend her own situation. Frankly I lean toward her being seriously mentally ill. There's a difference between cleanliness being low on one's list of life's priorities and willingly living in a place that should be condemned as unfit for human habitation.

By the way, she shouldn't be sending her bug-infested maggot-ridden items to the Goodwill. They don't want filth and they then have to spend money disposing of it. That is not the purpose of Goodwill.

    Bookmark   November 17, 2004 at 9:45AM
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