Very Delicate Situation

romy2004September 14, 2005

After ten months of renovation, we were finally able to access the rest of our apartment. Dh and I are in the living room; it's a beautiful night so windows are open and as we look up from our sofa, there are our new neighbors in the apartment opposite us having graphic sex in their living room. The shades were up and you could see everything.

We thought this might be a one-time event but again, yesterday, the same thing happened.

We do not know what to do - say something to them about it or keep quiet. Because sometimes mentioning a touchy subject just eggs them on. We like to entertain, business and personal, and the way our living room is set up, the only way the seating can go is facing this apartment. I do not even want to think about what would happen if our guests saw this kind of behavior. In the wintertime, yes, we can close our blinds and windows but now, what do we do?

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Pop some corn.
Grab a beer.
And, set up the video camera.
You'll be rent free in notime.

    Bookmark   September 14, 2005 at 4:51PM
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A note on their door, pointing out that a pervert like HappyCthulhu could be taping them and selling it on the internet, might make them close the blinds.

Also, they have no "reasonable expectation of privacy". If they can see into other apartments from the place they choose to have sex, it's assumed that other people can see into theirs. If any apartments have kids that can see them, a charge of public indecency could be brought. There is plenty of precedent, such as the guy who stood naked inside his living room window as the schoolbus let out ... he was convicted despite being in his house.

    Bookmark   September 14, 2005 at 5:31PM
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Happy, that was very funny. Had my laugh for the day over it.

lazygardens, I agree - you don't know who is watching you. We hope these people are not voyeurs as their escapades were right in front of the window. Dh and I did voice our concern to each other about the children in our building. We have three down the hall from us - two right next to these people. And our friends have children - we certainly do not want them exposed to this kind of behavior.

    Bookmark   September 14, 2005 at 6:00PM
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voyeurs watch; exhibitionists show.

And they are most CERTAINLY exhibitionists to do this ONCE; twice, and there's no doubt. Not in anyone's mind.

the heck with kids--YOU do not want to be exposed to this kind of behavior.

First, if you know their address, perhaps drop them a note saying, "we could see you having sex through your apartment window. This is not conducive to either your privacy or ours. We're certain you'll want to avoid this in the future."

It happens again, you leave them a note saying "we will now take steps so that this won't happen again."

You live in a co-op--are these people in your co-op? If so, bring your complaint to the board after you've given them fair warning.

If they're not in your co-op, you could try approaching the board of THEIR co-op. (*my* co-op board would yank their right to tenancy so fast, their head would spin. It can be done; it can be expensive, but my board would spring for it.)

And, you call the cops.

(If you wanted to, you could call the cops now, without bothering with warnings

If ANYONE can see them, surely a charge of public indecency can be brought, and you should bring it.

    Bookmark   September 15, 2005 at 11:42AM
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" voyeurs watch; exhibitionists show" - that shows you how educated we are on the subject. lol

Here's the story, Sue. These people live in our building, on our floor. Our apartment is a corner apartment. Our windows face the street and the courtyard. Their's is not a corner apartment but all their windows face us in the courtyard.

We never had a problem with the previous tenant who, by the way, was a young bachelor who always seemed to have company. But he was discreet and considerate. These people just moved in and actually introduced themselves to us. "Hi, I'm Mike. If there is anything that I can ever do for you". I, at first, thought he was being helpful. Now, I'm not so sure. lol

You already know how my board works and now, with the only member voted off who gave a damn and the sponsor controlling the board, we don't think we would get anywhere. Actually, we know we wouldn't get anywhere especially if these people are renters. The attitude of the sponsor is "as long as they pay their rent, who cares". Sad, but true.

I like the note idea. I know lazygardens had also said something about this. Yes, I do believe that is the way to go. Thank you.

    Bookmark   September 15, 2005 at 2:43PM
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also, just for info's sake, call the precinct and ask to speak w/ the public affairs officer. Ask him whether this would be illegal, and how you would go about it.

I'd forgotten about your board--or at least, I'd thought there was someone OTHER than the sponsor on the board.

    Bookmark   September 16, 2005 at 5:58PM
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"I'd thought there was someone else OTHER than the sponsor on the board".

There is, but the sponsor might as well have all the spots. These people are in the sponsor's corner not ours. The sponsor made sure that they were elected and vetoed all our choices at the annual meeting. Nice, huh!

    Bookmark   September 17, 2005 at 2:31AM
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I had one other thought--get their phone number,a nd then, if they start this again, call them right away, while they're still in the middle of it. Let the phone ring until they answer, and then ask them to please close their blinds.

    Bookmark   September 20, 2005 at 11:13AM
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What about caller ID? I'd rather be anonymous. I think the note or calling the police would be best.

    Bookmark   September 20, 2005 at 3:56PM
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Use your cell phone.

    Bookmark   September 20, 2005 at 8:51PM
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Costco has a very nice 15 Million candlepower spotlight at a very reasonable price. I think I'd wait until the middle of their next show, turn it on and snap a few shots with a digital camera. (Mine has a really great zoom lens!) Leave prints on the front door and maybe a few at the community mailbox. That'll either solve the problem or just encourage it...

    Bookmark   September 21, 2005 at 3:00PM
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Thanks all. Just thought I would update you. Things have been kind of strange in that apartment. Looks like no one has been in there since the "incident". All the rooms are entirely visible from our place. The lights are on all the time, the shades are still up, television and computer are on but yet, no sign of anyone. Next time I see the super, I am going to ask him who these people are. Who knows what is going on there?

    Bookmark   September 22, 2005 at 2:15PM
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An update??

    Bookmark   October 21, 2005 at 6:32PM
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Like I said in my post of September 22, 2005, things have been very strange there. I had to call management regarding some leaky windows that occurred during last week's deluge and casually asked them who was living in this apartment. Supposedly, he is a doctor which would explain the lights on at odd hours but doesn't explain the behavior. Management is not crazy about him as two violations have already been issued - not sure for what. And he has a habit of blasting his radio so loud that everyone on our side of the building can hear it clearly. The other day, it went on for hours. It has been quieter for a few days so maybe another violation was issued? He did purchase the apartment, and unless he corrects his behavior, I have a feeling that he will not be here for long. He's got some attitude!

    Bookmark   October 22, 2005 at 8:41AM
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